I was in the bathroom one morning a number of years ago getting ready for my day. As I was shaving and taking care of my morning routine, my gremlin was actively and negatively commenting about a number of specific things related to my appearance. That nasty and critical voice in my head said, Look at you, you look awful! Your hair is thinning, you’re gaining weight, you have dark circles under your eyes, and those worry lines on your forehead keep getting deeper. You’re clearly not taking good care of yourself.
Mike Robbins
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One of my main focuses for this New Year is trust! So often, especially at this time of year, we put our attention on all the things we think we “should” do to make ourselves “better.” What if we made a commitment to listen to ourselves, trust our intuition, and trust that things are unfolding exactly as they are meant to?
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How healthy are your boundaries? Maybe you think about this directly and often, maybe not. Boundaries weren’t something I personally spent much time thinking about for many years. I’ve often related to the concept of boundaries in a negative way. Of course I’ve known they’re important, especially in the context of parenting, relationships, and work, but the idea of having clear and specific boundaries had sometimes seemed limiting or restrictive to me.
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How much time do you spend improving yourself? How much time do you spend consciously accepting who you are as a being? If I just lost a little weight… made a little more money… improved my health… had more inspiring work… lived in a nicer place… THEN I’d be happy. Mike Robbins questions “What if we changed our approach and with as much love, compassion, and vulnerability as possible, just accepted ourselves exactly as we are, right now” – how would that make you feel?
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Family & RelationshipsHealth & Well-beingSpirituality
There’s No Right Track
by Mike Robbins August 17, 2013Do you feel you are on the ‘right track’? What is there was no such thing as a ‘right track’? Mike Robbins tosses that concept out the window and asks us to consider simply living in alignment with who we are. How? Read on…
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A good way to delve more deeply into your own Purpose is to ask the simple but important question, “If money and logistics weren’t an issue, what would I do and where would I focus my attention and energy?”
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Do you try to change everything around you but nothing seems to change? Mike Robins reflects on how the real change begins within…
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We all make mistakes, but what can we take from them? In this blog Mike Robbins author of “Be Yourself Everyone Else is Taken” talks about giving ourselves and others permission to make mistakes, so we can actually create an environment within our own being and within our key relationships and teams, that is conducive to trust, connection, risk-taking, forgiveness, creativity, and genuine success.
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How do you feel about change? If you’re anything like me, you probably have mixed feelings about it. While it often depends on our perception of the type of change – big or small, good or bad, needed or unnecessary, easy or hard, etc. – most of us seek and fear change simultaneously.
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Health & Well-being
Stop Comparing Yourself to Others by Mike Robbins
by Mike Robbins October 11, 2012How often do you compare yourself to others? If you’re anything like me and most of the people I know and work with, probably more than you’d like to admit. And, as you may have noticed (like I have), this comparison process never seems to feel very good or work very well, does it?
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A few months ago one of my mentors said to me, “Mike, it sounds like you’re ’should-ing’ all over yourself.” I laughed when she said this, as I’ve heard this saying many times before (and have even given this same feedback to others). However, something about her saying this to me at that particular moment caught my attention and struck me deeply.
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Embracing Powerlessness by Mike Robbins
by Mike Robbins August 9, 2012Powerlessness seems almost like a dirty word to me, at least to my ego for sure. Priding myself on being a “powerful person” and in the business of “empowering” others, I couldn’t imagine what embracing powerlessness even meant, let alone see the value in doing it myself.
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Family & RelationshipsHealth & Well-being
Your Feelings Matter by Mike Robbins
by Mike Robbins July 17, 2012It has been humbling to come to this realization about myself recently. However, it has also been incredibly liberating to see this pattern and to ask myself the question, “What would it be like to honor my real feelings and to live my life knowing that what I want and feel is just as important as anyone else?”
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About a year or so ago I started playing a game with my two girls, Samantha (our six year old) and Rosie (our three and a half year old). The…
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Health & Well-being
READ: Are You Addicted to Struggle? by Mike Robbins
by Mike Robbins April 13, 2012During a session I was having with my new coach last week it became clear to me that I’ve been addicted to struggle for much of my life. While I…
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Something extraordinary happened at Candlestick Park in San Francisco two Saturdays ago, January 14th. Sure it was an amazing ending to an NFL playoff game between the San Francisco 49ers…
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READ: Let Go of Negative Comparison by Mike Robbins
by Mike Robbins December 6, 2011Sadly, many of us spend and waste lots of time and energy comparing ourselves to others. Often times we end up feeling inferior to people based on our own self judgment and hyper criticalness. However, we also may find ourselves feeling superior to some of the people around us, based on certain aspects of our lives and careers we think are going well and/or the specific struggles of the people in our lives. Reunions (as well as things like Facebook, holiday letters, and more) can can often highlight or intensify this phenomenon.
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I’m sometimes amazed and embarrassed by how critical I can be both of other people and of myself. Even though I both teach and practice the power of appreciation (as well as acceptance, compassion, and more) when I find myself feeling scared, threatened, or insecure (which happens more often than I’d like it to), I notice that I can be quite judgmental. Sadly, as I’ve learned throughout my life, being critical and judgmental never works, feels good, or leads me to what I truly want in my relationships and in my life. Can you relate to this?
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Escape the “better than” / “less than” comparison trap because regardless of what side we’re stuck in a negative loop
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Family & RelationshipsHealth & Well-being
READ: The Power of Empathy
by Mike Robbins October 18, 2011I had a painful, but poignant phone conversation earlier this week with my wife Michelle. She shared some challenges with me in a vulnerable and passionate way. As I started…
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Over the past few months I’ve been looking at the phenomenon of approval seeking that exists in my life and my relationships. My mother’s death has brought up an intense mix of emotions and reflections. Like most people, my mom was a fundamental source of love for me, especially early in my life. As such, I learned various ways, from quite a young age, to gain her approval. Although this evolved over time and I outgrew certain aspects of approval seeking from my mom specifically, I realize now that I was much more attached to her approval, even as an adult, than I thought I was.