But Are You Having Fun?

There’s one thing that a lot of us leave out of the equation when we set out to create amazing relationships and lives. We spend plenty of time and resources learning how to communicate peacefully, attract abundance and live harmoniously with other people and our Earth and these are all important and worthwhile ways to focus energy.

Something often gets shoved aside or deliberately rejected though.

You have frequent conversations with your partner about how to argue, blame and criticize each other less and improve your relationship so that it will thrive and continue to grow. You spend an accumulation of countless hours worrying about how your relationship is doing and what might happen if you don’t turn certain habits around.

Again, this can be beneficial, but unfortunately, it’s where a huge mistake gets made.

In the process of trying to be more spiritual and compassionate and loving and living the right way, it’s easy to forget an essential ingredient for a joyful and passionate life…

It’s easy to get so caught up in wiping out the “bad” habits, we forget to have fun. We associate silly, light-heartedness and mirth with being irresponsible or immature. Deep down inside, we just don’t believe there’s room for adults to have fun AND healthy relationships AND make positive contributions to the world.

We’re also very, very busy. How many of us are over-committed and stretched? Whether it’s balancing career and family, making time for fitness and community involvement or just making the check last until the next payday, life can get overly full and stressful too.

This is when even the thought of carving out some time merely for fun feels indulgent.

But it’s not. Regular fun is not only relaxing and good for your health, it’s absolutely necessary for a close and connected relationship too. If you want to be spiritually stronger and more tapped in to Source, fun has got to be a regular part of your life.

The reason why is simple…

When you are wound up tight and tense, you are much more likely to misunderstand your partner as well as your own wants and needs. “Crises” and drama run rampant as you are cut off from not only the facts of a situation, but also your inner knowing and spiritual connection. It’s kind of like trying to receive a bouquet of flowers from a loved one with your fists clenched. Doesn’t work too well.

Introduce fun and everything lightens up. Your perspective becomes clearer and more flexible. You know what’s best for you AND you can more easily hear and honor what’s best for your partner (and others) as well. Fun is the vehicle for the kind of openness and connection that you and your relationship require for optimum experience.

Give permission for fun.
Explore your beliefs about what it means to be all of the things you aspire to be: “responsible,” “successful,” “mature,” “spiritual,” “a good spouse,” “a positive role model” and more. If you’re like many people, these are serious and mean a lot to you. The word “fun” may not seem to go along with them because of what you were taught from example and experience.

What if you could be ALL of these things you want to be AND have fun along the way?

You can and it starts when you tell yourself that it’s okay to let down your guard, lighten up and include more fun. For the vast majority of us, the very first step in having more fun is giving ourselves permission to do so which means we stop relegating what’s silly and laughable to those rare moments when we deem it to be acceptable to loosen up and go a little crazy.

Be on the lookout for fun.
Fun can happen in any moment of any day. It can’t be forced, but it can be invited in. Develop the habit of looking for the fun potential in whatever you are doing.

Make a game in your mind of the project you’ve been slogging through at work. Get playful with the soap bubbles as you tackle dinner dishes. Invent a funny song to sing with your partner and children as you all pass the time standing in line for the movies.

Fun can take center stage as you think up date night activities to do with your partner. Use your imagination and step outside the box of the usual dinner and a movie. Or if you do dinner and movie as an outing with your love, choose outrageous places to go and films to watch.

The goal here is to smile and laugh your way to more passion, more connection and more…fun.