I used to host a monthly free teleconference called “Community Conversations”. One of the most memorable discussions was about the ego and how it played out in our lives. I will pose the same question to you that I asked the group, “are you in charge of your ego or is your ego in charge of you?” There are a few definitions of ego: the self, especially as distinct from the world and other selves; in psychoanalysis, the division of the psyche that is conscious, most immediately controls thought and behavior, and is most in touch with external reality; an exaggerated sense of self-importance; conceit, appropriate pride in oneself; self-esteem. I believe that we all experience the good news and the interesting news of our ego and how it affects our lives. However, more often than not the ego quietly affirms separation, lack and limitation.
As the group on the call dialogued, there were some amazing revelations that poured forth into the conversation that I took note of. I was struck with the honesty and clarity of each participant that spoke. Here are some of the ideas and feelings:
- Many of us have been taught to be liked and not to stand out
- People who are successful are arrogant; our job is to make people comfortable
- I have to let others win to be liked or pretend that I am less than I know that I am
- I have been living small my whole life and don’t know how to do it differently
- I am afraid of being squashed if I show people who I really am
- I am terrified to say the wrong thing and be misunderstood
Do any of these thoughts resonate with you? I know that I, personally, have floated in and out of these arenas on many occasions in my life and it has taken work to become more conscious about what voice I listen to. Whenever the “monkey mind” voice is talking about separation, fear or doubt, the negative aspects of ego are running. If I listen to these thoughts, it will affect my decisions.
Eckhart Tolle says “Most people are in love with their particular life drama. Their story is their destiny. The ego runs their life. They have their whole sense of self invested in it.”
I would like to invite you to contemplate these thoughts:
- We are here to be powerful and share our gifts
- There is nothing that can stop our greatness
- We were not put on this earth to play small or hide
- Negative self-talk will not support us in being extraordinary
Affirmation: Today, I only listen to the inner voice that reminds me of my powerful and abundant life.
Written by Cynthia James
Cynthia James is a transformational specialist guiding people as they make changes for lasting healing in their lives. Ms James’ life was transformed as she transcended a childhood of violence and abuse, and that experience has created the foundation for all her programs. As a speaker, teacher, singer and award winning author of “What Will Set You Free” and “Revealing Your Extraordinary Essence”, Cynthia has coached and supported thousands of people into healthy and vibrant living. Her program, Advanced Awareness Coaching offers depth, focus and results for high level business creatives. Cynthia created and facilitated the Venus Transit University teleseries, which ran from June 5 to July 6, 2012. In the fall of 2012, she developed the Global Blessing Blog. Ms James has completed a Masters Degree in Consciousness Studies from Holmes Institute and in Spiritual Psychology from the University of Santa Monica. Cynthia is personally committed to utilizing creative expression as a vital and effective healing modality that will assist everyone in their own personal and professional growth. www.cynthiajames.net
