A family in my home town recently suffered an unimaginable loss. Their 12 year old son was injured while playing catch at a baseball game. He died as a result of that injury a short time later.
Shocking, tragic, sad, surreal, unthinkable and unbelievable would be accurate words to describe what many have felt and experienced who were close to this family and their son. They say it takes a village to raise a child, so when one is lost, that village feels the pain.
The local baseball and football leagues he played for set up a memorial fund. Many fundraising efforts have been occurring and I attended one such fundraiser at a local burger restaurant last week. I took my 2 sons there for lunch, not quite knowing what to expect. With all the news coverage and the closeness of our community, I knew it would possibly be crowded and might even be heart-wrenching. We walked through the doors and the lines were almost outside the building. My sons found a table and waited there while I headed into the line.
I quickly took notice, while in line, at the staggering amount of kids present that afternoon. The crowd was predominantly 13 and under. At first, it struck me as so very sad that these youngsters had to deal with the death of a friend at such a young age. Then I realized that, although it was indeed sad, it was also very poignant. There was something very different about this scene.
It was obvious and yet, surprising; these kids were not afraid. Often, when somebody dies, adults spend a great deal of time wondering how to grieve. It seems we get somewhat caught up in not wanting to say or do the wrong thing that might upset the people suffering the most from the loss (like the spouse or family). This was not the case at all in this crowd and it was surprisingly comforting and beautiful to see.
Everywhere there were handmade t-shirts, adorning youngsters, that expressed the name of their friend and a saying they created to show their emotion about his death. They were free in their demonstration of love and sorrow, not afraid to show it in any number of ways. It was not uncomfortable though and you could feel that love; it covered you like a warm blanket and made the unthinkable a little more bearable.
I learned something important during my 45 minute wait in line that day, from a group of unlikely teachers I don’t even know. The grace of those kids who packed that restaurant will stay with me, it changed me. If only we all took that approach when a loved one passes, to fearlessly express our love by any means necessary, and not to worry what another might think. The truth is, you could not possibly make the experience worse with anything done out of love. In my 44 years of life, I never realized it. I have held back and held together during the deaths of my grandparents and other family members, all the while wanting to express my grief in other ways.
I left that restaurant astonished. So amazingly beautiful was the energy of that day, born from tragedy. It’s funny what you can accomplish on an average day in 45 minutes; vacuum the house, grocery shop, drive to work, a dentist appointment, soccer practice, etc…. I doubt anything I do for a long time to come will come close to what I experienced in those 45 minutes. The unwitting lesson in benevolence from kids just doing what kids do; expressing emotion, without censoring , when it was truly needed the most. God bless them for that and for showing it without reservation; unknowingly helping to heal this village that’s lost one of its own.
Gina Sendef is a independent Spiritual Self-Help Author and Angel Intuitive. Writing is her life long passion. Her soon to be self-published first book, “Truth Works, Divine Life Lessons for Kids of all Ages”, is a self-help book geared towards reading age children, teens and young adults. The premise for Truth Works is to undo harmful affects that exisit when our children are taught traditional life lessons like “life is not fair” or “money is the root of all evil”. The goal of the book is to undo this programming at a young age, ensuring the subconscious belief system for our children is optimistic, safe and secure. When we address these destructive beliefs in childhood and expose their false nature, they cannot reside in our subconscious minds for a lifetime as the basis for our beliefs. We are left with the pure, positive and absolute spiritual TRUTH. She created Angel Works as a means to work with the positive and loving energy of the angels to provide people with guidance that will improve their health, uncover their life’s purpose, enrich their relationships and enhance their lives. http://www.ginasendef.com/
Read more from Gina Sendef: