VividLife.me » self-discovery

READ: Just let go of what doesn’t work! by Renee Vos de Wael

Renee vos de Wael — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 19:26:43 +0000

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
- Albert Einstein

It is already week two in the new year. I have had a busy week, with little time for myself. That is what sometimes what happens in a family. But this week it was not a matter of choice nor of control. It was all completely out of my say and it meant that we all just had to deal with the situation we were in. Stuck together. Funny enough we all did. Sometimes you can surprise yourself, but to be surprise by others at the same time is a good feeling. It got me thinking on the thinks I had planned to do, when the holiday season was over. The goals I had set out and the activities that I want to do. We all start of a new period with a lot of energy and many things on our to do list.

Because we were all completely thrown out by this week and not able to do what we had set out to do, it is very easy to slip back into bad habits. Looking at that I wondered what wasn’t working for me last year. It is moments like these, being challenged, that there is a choice. What do we choose right now and what did we choose last year! It made me really quite and I reflected back. Because it is important to let by gone’s be by gone’s. There are many stories and even songs written about this. Last year I wrote about leaving luggage behind. So not to be able to start with what I had planned could be considered to be a set back. It didn’t feel like that at all. It sure gave me an opportunity to think about what could I leave in 2011.

To be honest the most important one for me is, don’t over think every thing. Any one recognizing this? It probably is the number one thing that takes away a lot of my time and energy. It is a silly thing to do. We all know that, but it is so easy to get yourself into. It comes from a point of really caring for every one around you and even a way for looking to get approvement from others in the circle we life in. Is it? “Was I kind to this person today” or “Completely forgot that she has a special diet” or “I should have helped my colleague to finish her presentation this afternoon?”. These are often the starting points and then the over thinking is creating a complete life of their own. Things from last week, last year, yesterday and what will happen tomorrow will start popping into our heads. But none of all of this will help us, it will only take away attention from other events going on around us at that moment. So it will be a lot better to stop this all together. Of course that is easier said than done. A good start is to take a deep breath when you notice this is going on. Don’t judge yourself, just notice. After this to just say stop. After taking time to breath and really notice that you’re breathing is becoming calmer and more from the belly. Then you can start to replace your thoughts with events that were nice that day. There are always so many nice encounter with friends and colleague’s. This is where we start a different look at what has happened today. The great lady at the shop that really liked you hair or you when you stepped in for a colleague. It all starts to change with that first step you take to pay attention to events differently.

What will be your thing to leave behind in 2011?

My name is Renée Vos de Wael. I am a coach, educator, group facilitator, walker, traveler, wife, mother and student. Being a globetrotter for over 10 years brought me an open minded, flexible attitude towards life. I love the idea that we can reinvent ourselves whenever we need or want to. Working with and for people has been my passion and is rewarding in many ways. The different cultures where I live in teach me to view life from a different angle and give a change to enroll into a life filled with challenges and opportunities. Life is beautiful, there are so many opportunities to grow and learn. Let me be your opportunity for finding your true self and your talents! http://reneevosdewael.com/

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Moving past fear…….
Fear what does that mean to you? This is a word that is used very often and sometimes I wonder if it is really a bad thing. Fear is an emotion that comes naturally as a situation is dangerous or when we were taught that a situation is dangerous. Especially as parents we spend a lot of time explaining to our kids when they should be alert and pay attention. As they do look at situations from a completely differently point of view. It also depends on,…

What is Love? by Panache Desai

If you’ve found your way here for advice on love, then I can only assume that you are still searching for this elusive experience. And you’re not alone. Globally, more than 225 million searches are conducted each month on the Internet for advice on what is love? For those who have been less than lucky in love and are trying to do it better, healthier, or wiser this time, you have my love and support.

Technorati Tags: healing, inspiration, Life with Direction, personal development, Personal Growth, self help, self-discovery

READ: Telling the Truth About What Is Here by Gangaji

Gangaji — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 01:00:32 +0000

One of the most powerful phrases in human language is “I am here.” It is powerful because it is utterly simple and profoundly true. Anything that is said or thought afterward is just an addition to this basic, unfaltering truth. In fact I and am and here are all pointing to the same essential truth, pointing to that which needs no foundation for its support, because it is the foundational truth.

Even “I am not here,” comes from the truth of being here. Denial of presence can only be stated here, where you are. The power to deny yourself comes from the truth of yourself.

In recognizing that basic truth, I am here, you have the opportunity to be welcomed here, to welcome yourself here, and to welcome what else has appeared here, in whatever state you find present in yourself.

I am inviting you to tell the truth, as completely as possible, about what is here. You probably have particular feelings that are here. Can you welcome them? When feelings change, you are still here. Feelings will change, which may be a good thing or a bad thing, but you remain. Here remains. Here doesn’t change. Things that appear here change.

Tomorrow comes here, yesterday was here. The sun comes here, clouds come here. Limitless beingness, here, discovers itself as I. The ground of the ground, the beingness of your being.

In this very moment you can tell this basic truth, I am here, and meet whatever is evoked by that truth telling. You can rest your mind in this truth. Your thinking mind can be embraced by this truth.

As an investigation, just in this moment, can you find a beginning or an end to here?

Has here ever been absent from your life?

Can you find a time in your life when you ever were not?

You can also turn your attention to the pronoun that everyone uses, I. If you do not limit I to a particular story about I, or a particular definition, or a particular gender, or a particular body, can you recognize it here as consciousness? Deeper and closer than any thought, and yet informing every thought.

In recognizing the particular thoughts that attempt to define I, and attempt to define being, and attempt to define here, in any moment we can simply return to the fundamental truth that needs no definition for its truthfulness.

I am here.

Then we can ask ourselves, “Is it enough?” If full attention is turned to I am here, is anything lacking?

There is no correct answer. It is a discovery.

This blog is adapted from a talk given by Gangaji at Hollyhock, Cortes Island, BC in September 2011. Gangaji’s new book Hidden Treasure: Uncovering the Truth in Your Life Story, was published in September by Tacher/Penguin. In this life-changing book, Gangaji uses the telling of her own life story to help readers uncover the truth in their own. Publisher’s Weekly said, “This gently flowing but often disarming volume invites readers to examine the narratives that shape them, and is a call to pass beyond personal stories to find a deeper, more universal self.” Visit www.gangaji.org for more information about Gangaji and her upcoming events, including the monthly Webcast / Conference Series, With Gangaji, which is currently undergoing an in-depth study of Hidden Treasure.

Gangaji shares a simple message – “This is an invitation to shift your allegiance from the activities of your mind to the eternal presence of your being.” Born in Texas in 1942, Gangaji grew up in Mississippi. After graduating from the University of Mississippi in 1964, she married and had a daughter. In 1972, she moved to San Francisco where she began exploring deeper levels of her being. She took Bodhisattva vows, practiced Zen and Vipassana meditation, helped run a Tibetan Buddhist Meditation Center, and had a career as an acupuncturist in the San Francisco Bay area. Despite her successes, Gangaji continued to experience a deep and persistent longing for fulfillment. She pursued many paths to change her life including relationship, motherhood, political activism, career, and spiritual practice, but even the greatest of her successes ultimately came up short. In the wake of her disillusionment, she made a final prayer for true help. In 1990, the answer to her prayer came unexpectedly, taking her to India and to the meeting that would change everything. There on the banks of the river Ganga, she met Sri H.W.L. Poonja, also known as Papaji, who opened the floodgates of self-recognition. In this meeting, Gangaji’s personal story of suffering ended and the promise of a true life began to flower and unfold. Today, Gangaji travels the world speaking to seekers from all walks of life. A teacher and author, she shares her direct experience of the essential message she received from Papaji and offers it to all who want to discover a true and lasting fulfillment. Through her life and words, she powerfully articulates how it is really possible to discover the truth of who you are and to be true to that discovery. Gangaji’s website www.gangaji.org

READ: Don’t Put Anyone Out Of Your Heart by Ed and Deb Shapiro

Ed and Deb Shapiro — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 20:00:37 +0000

The story goes that, at the time of the Buddha, a group of monks wanted to do a quiet retreat away from the crowds of followers, so the Buddha sent them to a glade in the forest where he said they would be undisturbed.

The monks found their way there and settled down to meditate. But what they didn’t know was that this particular glade was inhabited by a gang of tree spirits who were really upset that the monks had come. And when tree spirits get upset they can be extremely scary, ugly, very smelly and unbelievably noisy, ferociously shrieking all over the place. They did everything they could to spook the hermits and make them leave. And it worked. The monks decided they couldn’t possibly meditate with so many disturbances, so they went back to the Buddha and begged him to let them go somewhere else.

But no. Instead, the Buddha taught them a meditation practice of loving kindness, or metta in Sanskrit, which develops loving kindness towards everyone, including yourself and your enemies. And then he sent the monks back to the forest. His famous words were: This is the only protection you will need.

Thinking the Buddha must be mad the monks reluctantly went back to the glade, sat down and began practicing metta. And the tree spirits, who at first were not at all pleased to see them returning, no longer had any affect on them. For all their antics, the monks just kept sitting there, beaming out kindness. Eventually the spirits were won over by the waves of love and compassion emanating from these robed ones and, far from than chasing them away, the same nasty’s that had been so ferocious now became disciples.

The question is, who are the tree spirits? Realistically, they are everything that goes on in our own minds—all the doubts, fears, anger, insecurities, and negative thoughts—that constantly undermine our basic goodness, which is innate in all of us. And the point the Buddha was making is that loving kindness—metta–has the capacity to overcome all manner of inner monsters and ghouls and lead us to a true heart opening. Metta is the act of extending our love, kindness and friendship equally towards all beings, proving that love is more powerful than any negative force. Rather than trying to deal with negativity, we cultivate the opposite; seeing and knowing pain, we bring caring and kindness.

We know this sounds so easy: just be kind and loving, how great, what a cool idea. But in practice it’s not always so simple, such as when someone says or does something that is personally critical, derogatory or hurtful. Can metta still flow when the ego-mind is upset? By focusing on loving kindness as a way of living, it shows us all those places that are bound in ego and selfishness; it brings us up against our limitations and boundaries. Where do we meet our edge? Where is our capacity to step over the edge into greater kindness? How genuine is our ability to be altruistic in a difficult situation?

We remember talking with our friend Ram Dass at the time of the Clinton/Dole election. He told us how he had a picture of Bob Dole on his meditation altar as: “Dole needs the most love and compassion as he is the one being so vilified.”

In that act, Ram Dass was practicing true metta. It was an important reminder not to cast anyone out of our hearts, for in the process we are casting out ourselves. If we feel affected by someone being dismissive, critical or hurtful, it is invariably because there is a hook in us for that negativity to grab hold of, a place where it can land and trigger all our hidden feelings of unworthiness, insecurity, and self-doubt.

However, when we extend metta toward someone we are having a hard time with, an extraordinary thing happens: the landing place, or the hook within, begins to dissolve. Then the negativity has no place to go. Metta asks that we stay caring, that we keep our heart open to the situation we are struggling with and all the accompanying annoyance and anger, and hold ourselves with gentle tenderness. Then amazing change is possible.

5 minute Loving Kindness Meditation

Begin by breathing into you’re the area of your heart, softening and relaxing with the in-breath, letting go of tension on the out-breath. Hold your name or an image of yourself in your heart and silently repeat: May I be well, may I be happy, may I be filled with loving kindness.

Next, wish all beings be well, wish all beings be happy. If at work you can spend a few moments repeating the names of people you work with and wishing them happiness and joy. On your way home from work reflect on your day and generate loving thoughts to those you meet. At night, think of your family and friends and wish them wellness and happiness: May they be well, may they be happy, may they be filled with loving kindness.

Finish by taking a few deep breaths and slowly opening your eyes, nad have a smile on your face!

****

See our award-winning book: BE THE CHANGE, How Meditation Can Transform You and the World, forewords by the Dalai Lama and Robert Thurman, with contributors Jack Kornfield, Jon Kabat-Zinn, Byrone Katie, Jane Fonda, Marianne Williamson, and many others.

If there is one book you read about meditation Be The Change should be the one. Hear about some of the cool people who are doing it and why you should do it too. – Sharon Gannon, founder Jivamukti Yoga.

Our 3 meditation CD’s: Metta—Loving kindness and Forgiveness; Samadhi–Breath Awareness and Insight; and Yoga Nidra–Inner Conscious Relaxation, are available at: www.EdandDebShapiro.com

Ed and Deb Shapiro are the authors of BE THE CHANGE, How Meditation Can Transform You And The World, with forewords by the Dalai Lama and Robert Thurman and Winner of the 2010 Nautilus Gold Book Award. Deb is the author of the bestselling book, YOUR BODY SPEAKS YOUR MIND, winner of the 2007 Visionary Book Award. They are featured bloggers on Oprah.com/spirit, HuffingtonPost.com/Living, and Care2.com. They have 3 meditation CD’s: Metta — Loving Kindness and Forgiveness; Samadhi – Breath Awareness and Insight; and Yoga Nidra – Inner Conscious Relaxation. See: www.EdandDebShapiro.com

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Does Your Relationship Ever Get You Down? by Ed and Deb Shapiro

Technorati Tags: appreciation, gratitude, Happiness, inspiration, love, Meditation, personal development, Personal Growth, self-discovery, Spirituality

READ: Does Your Relationship Ever Get You Down? by Ed and Deb Shapiro

Ed and Deb Shapiro — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 19:51:06 +0000

Shortly after we were married we went to India and spent our honeymoon in monasteries and ashrams. We also had a private meeting with the Dalai Lama at his residence in McLeod Ganj, in the foothills of the Himalayas. As Ed recalls: After some thirty minutes of talking with him I was feeling so moved by this gentle and loving man that I didn’t want to leave! I was completely in love with this delightful being. He was so ordinary, sitting between us and holding our hands. Finally, I said to him, ‘I don’t want to leave! I just want to stay here with you!’ I knew he would understand my sincerity and would say yes, how wonderful, I can see you are ready for the teachings. But, instead, he just smiled and said, ‘If we were together all the time we would quarrel!’

So relax, if the Dalai Lama can quarrel, so can we! Inevitably there are going to be times when relationship is not easy, when differences collide, when egos clash, when my needs seem more important than yours, or when your needs are not being met. For relationship creates untold problems. Sitting in solitary bliss with our hearts wide open and love pouring out of us towards all beings is relatively easy, but as soon as we come in direct contact with another person everything changes. Our ability to stay open and loving, our selflessness and generosity, all this and more is immediately confronted by someone else’s own wants and needs, by their capacity to accept and love or not.

Relationship is not just an integral part of being alive, it is also the most vital and challenging teacher we can ever have. Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche said, If you can make friends with one person, you can make friends with the world.

Difficulties in relationship show us the many ways our ego-selves try to be right, which can be a cause for either conflict or laughter. Once we were sharing some of our marriage issues with our meditation teacher, and he looked at us quite puzzled. ‘Why not just laugh?’ he suggested. And he was right. Laughter really is the best medicine. When we see the absurdity of two ego’s knocking heads and trying to outwit each other it is very amusing. So often a disagreement is about seeing the same thing in two different ways: one sees a white ceiling, the other sees a flat ceiling, but it’s the same ceiling!

Sometimes, it can be healthy to have a good quarrel, if we can then just let it go and come back to loving. There are bound to be times of flow and times of discord but we don’t need to hold on to either. Difficulties arise because we cling to our own opinion as being the right one and it’s this holding on, with the ensuing shame, blame and hostile silences, that causes so many problems.

In fact, those people we have a difficult time with are really our teachers. For without an adversary—or those who trigger strong reactions such as annoyance and anger—we would not have the stimulus to develop loving kindness and compassion. So we can actually thank our exasperating relationships for the chance to practice patience. What a gift!

We are not alone here, each one of us—both directly and indirectly—affect each other; everyone and everything is dependent on everything else. As Mother Theresa reminds us: If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten we belong to each other.

*****

See our award-winning book:BE THE CHANGE, How Meditation Can Transform You and the World, forewords by the Dalai Lama and Robert Thurman, with contributors Edgar Mitchell, Jack Kabat-Zinn, Byrone Katie, Jane Fonda, Marianne Williamson, and many others.

Deb is the author of the award-winning YOUR BODY SPEAKS YOUR MIND, Decoding the Emotional, Psychological, and Spiritual Messages That Underlie Illness.

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As we think so we become by Ed and Deb Shapiro

Most of us tend to think of our bodies and minds as separate entities and treat them as such: we feed and water our body, take it for walks and give it exercise; we feed our mind with ideas and amuse ourselves with various kinds of entertainment. If anything goes wrong we go to someone to sort it out, such as a doctor to fix our body or a therapist to treat our mind, Read On…

LOVING A WABI SABI SLOPPY JOE by Arielle Ford

Even though Diane truly loved Jerry (her husband who is 20 years her senior), she was confronted on a daily basis with something about him she found very hard to embrace: his passion for poppy seed bagels. Since childhood, Jerry has had a love affair with poppy seed bagels. In fact, he enthusiastically devours one nearly every day. Jerry’s slices and toasts his bagel, then takes it into, Read On…

Technorati Tags: appreciation, gratitude, Happiness, inspiration, love, Meditation, personal development, self-discovery, Spirituality

READ: Walking On The Moon And Moments That Change Your Life Forever

Ed and Deb Shapiro — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 16:01:17 +0000

Imagine walking on the moon and then returning to earth in Apollo 14? That’s what Edgar Mitchell, the 6^th astronaut to walk on the moon, talked to us about for our radio show and in our book, Be The Change. Few of us ever get to see the earth from outer space, but it was entering the vastness of space that led Mitchell to a deep, personal transformation, one of those moments that change us forever: unexpected and unlooked-for moments that take us out of our normal, rational selves and offer us a glimpse into another dimension of reality.

“We were coming home after being on the moon. As we rotated, a 360-degree panorama of the heavens appeared in the spacecraft window every two minutes. As my job had been the landing craft on the moon, I could now sit back and enjoy the view. I became immersed in the vastness of space. Suddenly, I realized the connectedness of everything, like the ancient mystics all said, and it was accompanied by this feeling of ecstasy, an overwhelming experience that I had never had before.”

Having a glimpse of a different reality can have the effect of turning us inward, as if the outer world loses its relevance while the inner world becomes alive and vibrant. As Mitchell continues:

” I wanted to know what had happened in that transcendent experience so when I got back to earth I started talking with Eastern mystics and holy men, and with spiritual people from all over the world. I studied virtually all the meditation disciplines and techniques and practices that there are. The only answer I came to was that I was in resonance, a deep quantum resonance with the ground of my being. A theologian would say the ground of our being is God; I would say it is a field of infinite energy and potential and that when we have such experiences we are in quantum resonance with that deep reality. And when we get in resonance with that reality, we have this feeling of deep peace and the sense that everything is really okay.”

Such transcended moments can take the form of dissolving our sense of being a separate self. For Deb’s mother, it occurred when she was washing the dishes and heard the sound of a wild bird’s song; in that moment, she became the sound and lost any sense of being apart from it. For Deb, it occurred when a worm crawled over her foot: “I was barefoot and had been walking slowly and meditatively across the grass. I had stopped and was standing very still and silent when this worm crawled out of the earth and traveled across my foot before disappearing back into the grass. I felt this intense gratitude that it had deemed me safe enough to walk over, and then I suddenly became it, there was no difference or separation between us. I too disappeared into the grass. In that moment I ceased to be a separate, ego-defined human. It changed the way I saw everything.”

Transcendence also awakens our heart to the love that is the essence of all life. Ed had this experience when he was on the ferryboat going from NYC to the Statue of Liberty. It was evening and he was gazing at the starlit sky. “It seemed the sky was clearer than usual with the stars shining brightly. It was if the microcosm became the macrocosm and there was no separation, just one breath. The universe was breathing and I was part of this universal breath, my whole body was breathing along with the whole cosmos. I became breath, and then it all became a bright light. All I could feel was that everything is love. I spun around and in every direction it was love! Within and without was love! Up and down was love! My whole being was blissful love!”

Such moments stay with us; they alter our fundamental awareness and constantly remind us not to take ourselves too seriously, that we are way bigger than we realize, and that that vastness is always available to us.

****

See our award-winning book: BE THE CHANGE, How Meditation Can Transform You and the World, forewords by the Dalai Lama and Robert Thurman, with contributors Edgar Mitchell, Jack Kabat-Zinn, Byrone Katie, Jane Fonda, Marianne Williamson, and many others.

Deb is the author of the award-winning YOUR BODY SPEAKS YOUR MIND, Decoding the Emotional, Psychological, and Spiritual Messages That Underlie Illness.

Listen to Ed and Deb’s VividLife Radio interview with Edgar Mitchell 6th Man to Walk on the Moon:

Shoot for the Moon with Astronaut Edgar Mitchell, 6th Man to Walk on the Moon

VividLife Radio’s Ed and Deb Shapiro welcome Edgar Mitchell, an American pilot, engineer, astronaut.and the sixth person to walk on the Moon to discuss realization , oneness and walking on the moon. Edgar Mitchell was presented with the Presidential Medal of Freedom in 1970 by President Richard Nixon.

Technorati Tags: appreciation, Grace Ste.Croix, gratitude, Happiness, inspiration, life purpose, love, Meditation, personal development, Personal Growth, self-discovery, Spirituality

READ: How Do You Deal With Burnt Toast? by Ed and Deb Shapiro

Ed and Deb Shapiro — Tue, 10 Jan 2012 20:43:09 +0000

We were with Deb’s mother, Anne Bancroft, in England. On the third day we were invited for tea at the House of Lord’s (more of that below) and were preparing to catch a train to London. In a bit of a rush we were quickly downing breakfast when the toast got burnt. We watched in amusement as Anne took a deep breath and said, “Oh dear, burnt toast,” calmly tossed it in the trash and put a fresh slice of bread in the toaster.

Few of us usually have such a reaction to burnt toast, especially when we are in a hurry. But Deb’s mom displayed the same attitude of calm acceptance later that day when we were having tea in London. Now, being invited to the House of Lords does not happen every day, but we were there to discuss a meditation project with one of the younger Lords. It is a stunningly beautiful old building, seeped in history and tradition and was a real treat for Ed, who grew up in the Bronx. We sat in the chambers and listened to the debate; we walked through the Queen’s robbing room where her throne sits; and then we went for tea.

Tea in the regal Tea Rooms sounds quintessentially English and we fully expected it to be of good English quality. The room was spectacular, the service was everything we could have wanted, but the cakes were not—they were boring, dry, commercial and cheap—not good Brit fare at all.

Accepting and simply being with what is, is a quality that Deb’s mother has perfected. It showed itself as she delicately ate her most unappetizing chocolate éclair. It is a quality that we can continue to learn in every moment that does not go our way. But, instead, we usually spend most of our time wishing that things were different – whether it is the big things like our partner or job, or the smaller things like the weather, burnt toast, or chocolate éclairs.

When we resist ‘what is’ then we create more suffering for ourselves, as there is a constant, underlying dissatisfaction, otherwise known as the ‘If Only…’ syndrome: if only this, that or the other happened, then I could be happy; if only so-and-so would change his or her behavior / lose weight / find a job, then I could be happy; if only I had more money / a bigger house / went traveling / had a good lover, then I could be happy. We were teaching a workshop and a participant, Mary, said she could only be happy when her children were happy. The list is endless. You can fill in the blank spaces for yourself.

Accepting what is, as it is, does not mean that we are like doormats and get passively walked over by all and sundry. Rather, it means recognizing that what happened even just a second ago can never be changed; it is letting the past be where it is so it does not take over the future.

At the same time we can make changes wherever necessary, working toward a saner and more caring present. This is really being best friends with ourselves and our world, because this is what is. We can either make a song and dance about burnt toast and get even more stressed, or we can take a deep breath and put a fresh slice of bread in the toaster.

****

See our award-winning book: BE THE CHANGE, How Meditation Can Transform You and the World, forewords by the Dalai Lama and Robert Thurman, with contributors Jack Kabat-Zinn, Byrone Katie, Jane Fonda, Marianne Williamson, and many others.

Deb is the author of the award-winning YOUR BODY SPEAKS YOUR MIND, Decoding the Emotional, Psychological, and Spiritual Messages That Underlie Illness.

Read more from VividLife.me Bloggers:

As we think so we become by Ed and Deb Shapiro

The Awakening Man ~ A Portrait of Possibility for Humankind by Jeff Brown

The awakening man is conscious, heartfully defined. Through his eyes, being conscious is not a cerebral construct, nor an intellectual exercise bereft of feeling. It is a felt experience, an ever-expanding awareness that moves from the heart outward. It is feeling God, not thinking God. The new man is always in process, awakening through a deepening interface with the world of feeling. He continues to strive for a more heartfelt and inclusive awareness…

Technorati Tags: appreciation, gratitude, Happiness, inspiration, love, Meditation, personal development, Personal Growth, self-discovery, Spirituality

READ: No One Has Any Idea What Will Happen Next by Ed and Deb Shapiro

Ed and Deb Shapiro — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 16:11:28 +0000

A new year has a very special effect: it makes us feel like we have the chance to start over, to do things right this time, to make amends, to become the person we really know we can be. Hence all those resolutions made with such determination.

So why does it take a new year to make us feel like this? Why is it that for 364 days we live with regret, doubt, holding on to what we did wrong and wishing we hadn’t, or dreaming of a future that can never happen because it doesn’t exist?

No matter how hard we would like to, there’s one thing we can never do and that’s change the past. We can weep, beat our fists against the wall, even eat bars of chocolate to assuage the guilt, but it won’t make the slightest bit of difference and won’t make us feel any better. The past is gone, over, no more, done.

Continuing to wish that our actions or words had been different means we’re really not in the present but are living in what-could-have-been or what-might-have-been or if-only. If the past is too painful or even too boring then we switch over to the future, that place of infinite potential that we want to believe could be real, like wishful thinking or a daydream. We live in what-might-be or what-could-be.

Of course we can learn from the past. Often the most painful experience turns out to be our best teacher; we can be grateful as the experience taught us so much. Memories can be like comfortable old shoes we are reluctant to part with. We can certainly put them on now and then, but we don’t have to hang out in them on a permanent basis.

Instead we can change our attitude toward what happened. Fully accepting that the past is irreversible and the future does not exist means we can actually just be in the present moment. Finally we can be here and now. Wow! What a relief! What a revelation!

Today is a very special day. It has never happened before and it will never happen again. And we have no idea what will come next. The greatest wonder is never being able to know what will happen next. No matter how hard we try, the future will always be ahead of us.

So what a great time just to be here now! The perfect day to let the past rest where it is and let the future take care of itself. As is every day. To experience just this moment, to pay attention to the colors, sounds, smells and sensations. To pay attention to our feelings, to other people’s feelings, and to make this day, this week, this month, and this year, one of beauty and tenderness.

******

See our award-winning book: BE THE CHANGE, How Meditation Can Transform You and the World, forewords by the Dalai Lama and Robert Thurman, with contributors Jack Kornfield, Gangaji, Jane Fonda, Ram Dass, Byron Katie, and others.

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Preparing for 2012 by Panache Desai

As the calendar year winds down you are presented an opportunity to reflect upon the events of 2011 with your heart, the ultimate barometer for feeling into every experience rather than evaluating the outcomes of the past 12 months through the limitations of your mind…

You are Sacred Purpose by Jeff Brown

You are not your shame, your fears, your addictions, your games, your guilt, the internalized remnants of negative messaging… You are not your resistance to your true path … You are not your self-doubt… You are not your self-distraction patterns. You are not your escape hatches… you are not your pessimism about a life of meaning and purpose. You are not here merely to survive and …

Technorati Tags: appreciation, gratitude, Happiness, inspiration, love, Meditation, Personal Growth, self help, self-discovery, Spirituality

READ: Lessons From Santa by Ed and Deb Shapiro

Ed and Deb Shapiro — Sat, 24 Dec 2011 00:18:16 +0000

Whether Santa is real or not really doesn’t matter, as he has been endowed with some remarkable qualities that we can all learn from. In fact, in many ways, he is better able to show us true spirituality than even the average guru!

1. He asks us to be good. Which is significant considering many of us so often act selfishly and greedily. By being good he means being kind, being generous, kind, considerate and thoughtful.

2. He gives to everyone, whoever and wherever they are, all at pretty much the same time. And he does it without asking for anything in return (except for the odd glass of milk and a few cookies). This indicates he has a truly generous heart, one that takes great joy in giving without needing to receive. Which is a very important lesson, as giving with no expectation of getting is the quickest route to happiness. Through giving to others, a la Santa, we get away from selfishness and neediness.

Yet he does not give blindly. Rather he considers what is the most appropriate gift for each. This shows great discernment. Too often we give without thinking — like giving candy to a starving child when what they need is food — so here Santa shows us how giving also needs wisdom in order to be of most benefit.

3. He listens to our requests and reads our letters. Meaning that he takes the time to hear and pay attention, which we could all do a lot more of. How often do we really listen to someone without judging them, or without imposing our own thoughts on them, or telling them what we think is right for them?

4. He has great psychic powers: he flies in the sky with reindeer, descends chimneys without getting covered in soot, he goes by many names and forms, and is extraordinarily elusive. Has anyone actually ever seen him? The lesson here is that we can all do more than we think we can, and we don’t need to be applauded. We can practice random acts of kindness quietly, simply, without bringing attention to ourselves.

5. He’s filled with joy and lifts our spirits at the darkest time. And we can do the same for each other. No need to spread doom and gloom, no need to focus on what is wrong with ourselves or the world. By focusing on what is good we not only bring a lightness of spirit to others, we also get to feel great ourselves.

6. He knows where we live. In other words, he is inside every one of us. Santa is our true, authentic self that is there when we let go of our ego-centered needs.

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give. Winston Churchill

Happy Holidays and Happy Giving!

******

Deb is the author of the award-winning YOUR BODY SPEAKS YOUR MIND, Decoding the Emotional, Psychological, and Spiritual Messages That Underlie Illness.

Read more from VividLife.me bloggers:

How to Chill When Times Get Stressed by Ed and Deb Shapiro

India is an extraordinary country where you get to meet all sorts of unusual people. On a recent visit we had tea with Mary and Don, a fascinating couple, who were born-again Christians from Texas. For over twenty-five years they had been running a clinic for disabled and handicapped children, caring for the poorest of the poor in Chennai, South India. We found their sincerity and commitment to the suffering that surrounded them powerfully moving.

Winter Solstice and the holidays by Pragito Dove

The winter solstice, December 22^nd, has been celebrated in cultures the world over for thousands of years. As the shortest day/longest night of the year, this start of the solar year is a celebration of light and the rebirth of the Sun. We have all completed one more official journey around the Sun. Many of the customs, lore, symbols, and rituals associated with the Solstice have survived into the 21^stcentury so let’s see how we can join in this ancient celebration to bring love, light, joy and meaning to this season.

Technorati Tags: appreciation, authenticity, gratitude, Happiness, healing, inspiration, love, Meditation, personal development, Personal Growth, self-discovery, Spirituality

READ: Personal growth takes center stage in ‘A Dangerous Method’

Brent Marchant — Fri, 23 Dec 2011 08:00:08 +0000

Psychiatric patient Sabina Spielrein (Keira Knightley, left) seeks treatment from famed Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung (Michael Fassbender, right) in director David Cronenberg's new historical drama, "A Dangerous Method." Photo by Liam Daniel, courtesy of Sony Pictures Classics.

“A Dangerous Method” (2011). Cast: Michael Fassbender, Keira Knightley, Viggo Mortensen, Vincent Cassel, Sarah Gadon. Director: David Cronenberg. Screenplay: Christopher Hampton. Book: A Most Dangerous Method, by John Kerr. Play: The Talking Cure, by Christopher Hampton. www.sonyclassics.com/adangerousmethod/index.php

Psychiatric colleagues Sigmund Freud (Golden Globe Award nominee Viggo Mortensen, left) and Carl Jung (Michael Fassbender, right) share professional insights in the new drama, "A Dangerous Method." Photo by Liam Daniel, courtesy of Sony Pictures Classics.

Despite recent advances in understanding, psychiatry is a discipline that’s still often misunderstood, even lampooned at times. However, things have come a long way over the years, and they stand to gain further ground with initiatives aimed at promoting greater awareness and acceptance. That effort has even carried over into the arts, such as in movies like the new historical drama, “A Dangerous Method.”

The film focuses on the life and career of famed Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung (Michael Fassbender) from 1904 to 1913, a time when he became involved in two of his most significant personal and professional relationships. The first was with one of his patients, Sabina Spielrein (Keira Knightley), a highly intelligent young woman prone to fits of unexplained hysteria. Over time, Jung helped her discover the source of her behavior, eventually curing her. He even assisted her in launching a career as a psychoanalyst after noting her natural capabilities in this area. At the same time, Sabina helped Jung discover things about himself that he never knew, prompting realizations that made him a better therapist and aided him in his own personal growth.

The second relationship Jung developed during this time was with the father of modern psychiatry, Sigmund Freud (Viggo Mortensen). In many respects, Freud was a mentor to Jung, advising him on various psychoanalytic techniques (Freud’s methodology even played a major role in Jung’s treatment of Sabina). However, an ever-widening gap between the colleagues began to develop over time. Jung, whose vision included a belief in the validity of unconventional notions like intuition and precognition, found Freud’s purely scientific method (and, specifically, his almost exclusive sexual interpretation of patients’ maladies) too limiting. Freud, on the other hand, considered many of Jung’s ideas to be superstitious nonsense that he feared would undermine the credibility of the psychiatric field. Before long, a split occurred between the two, but not until after a significant exchange of ideas occurred, many of which profoundly influenced Jung’s outlook, theories and practices.

While the film’s narrative is ostensibly about a specific period in Jung’s life, its script is in actuality more symbolic and idea-based than purely biographical. Perhaps the most significant theme is the picture’s spotlight on the uncanny parallels between the practices of psychotherapy and conscious creation. Both, for example, frequently require their participants (the patient, in the case of psychotherapy, and the practitioner, in the case of conscious creation) to “go within” and become introspective. The “work” that each does is quite similar; a psychiatric patient seeks to discover what’s behind his or her psychological discomfort, while a conscious creation practitioner endeavors to get a handle on his or her beliefs. And even though these objectives may not be identical, they’re remarkably alike in that both play a crucial role in creating the reality that manifests and is subsequently experienced.

This becomes very apparent in Jung’s therapy sessions with Sabina and with another of his patients, Otto Gross (Vincent Cassel), a referral sent to Jung by Freud. Through probing questions, Jung helps his patients discover the beliefs driving their behavior and, consequently, the reality they experience. Interestingly enough, however, the process also works in reverse: The patients’ answers often shed light on Jung’s own beliefs, helping the doctor to better know himself. In this regard, then, Jung’s patients are externalized projections of his own beliefs, providing him with a mirror of self-discovery and helping to illuminate the reality he’s creating and experiencing, ultimately yielding both professional and personal rewards.

For Jung, the impact of this is perhaps greatest in expanding his understanding of impulses. He comes to see the inherent danger in stifling them, particularly how self-imposed repressiveness can lead to severe behavioral disorders, a condition not uncommon in his time, given the prevailing puritanical values of the period. He also realizes that acting on such unexpressed impulses – allowing one’s true self to surface, to put it in conscious creation terms – is crucial to psychological health and well-being, especially when it comes to those of an emotional, sexual or metaphysical nature, something he witnesses firsthand in working with his patients. This, in turn, enables Jung to see which impulses of his own he’s stifling, particularly those related to the fulfillment of unexpressed sexual desires. As much as he loves his adoring wife (Sarah Gadon), he longs for other carnal experiences and comes to realize the harm he might be doing to himself by leaving those notions unexplored, an awareness that leads him to make some changes in his life. Not everyone may agree with his choices, but at least he’s being honest with himself in making them, assuredly one of the highest attainments one can aspire to as a conscious creator.

Psychiatric patient Otto Gross (Vincent Cassel, left) answers questions about himself that provide insights into both his psyche and that of his inquisitor, psychiatrist Carl Jung (Michael Fassbender, right), in director David Cronenberg's "A Dangerous Method." Photo by Liam Daniel, courtesy of Sony Pictures Classics.

But Jung’s journey involves more than discovering the uncharted territory of his waking life. He also probes the inner world of the psyche in ways that his more orthodox peers avoided. His interest in examining such phenomena as synchronicities, telepathy and dream analysis from a scientific perspective drew ridicule from colleagues, especially Freud. The unconventional nature of these ideas was too much for mainstream psychiatric professionals to consider, even with Jung’s insistence on using the scientific method to study them. However, he held steadfast to this vision, exploring it in greater detail later in life.

Jung’s approach to investigating this material raises another parallel to conscious creation, a process to reality manifestation driven by beliefs, the product of a synthesis between intellect (symbolic of science) and intuition (symbolic of spirit). Jung’s interest in integrating both disciplines showed that, on some level, he understood the conscious creation process and was willing to employ it in his research. This was also reflected symbolically in the very nature of the relationship between Jung and Freud, with each colleague embodying part of the process: Freud, the scientist, symbolized the intellect, while Jung, the budding spiritualist, represented the intuition. In presenting this material in this way, the film thus offers quite a fitting tribute to its protagonist, someone who was, ironically, so captivated by the presence – and power – of symbol in our lives.

Despite its many fine attributes, “A Dangerous Method” is definitely not everyone’s cup of tea, especially for more sensitive viewers. As much as I enjoyed it, I can appreciate that many moviegoers might find its talky script a bit tedious and its sexually provocative content somewhat disturbing (I’m honestly surprised this film received only an “R” rating instead of an “NC-17” designation). However, those who are not so easily bothered by such considerations will come away from this picture feeling rewarded.

Despite a loving marriage to his adoring and affluent wife Emma (Sarah Gadon, right), psychiatrist Carl Jung (Michael Fassbender, left) looks for more out of his personal life in the new historical drama release, "A Dangerous Method." Photo by Liam Daniel, courtesy of Sony Pictures Classics.

This offering from director David Cronenberg is quite a departure from his usual fare, but it succeeds in many respects. It features excellent performances by Fassbender and Mortensen, who deservedly earned a Golden Globe Award nomination for best supporting actor, as well as excellent period piece production values. The writing covers its material well, with ample wit and no psychobabble and providing viewers with an excellent introduction to the psychoanalytic process, although some of the screenplay’s transitions aren’t quite as smooth as they probably could have been. The movie’s only major letdown is its embarrassingly over-the-top performance by Knightley, who unfortunately lost sight of her role while gunning for hoped-for awards nominations, a real disappointment from an often-underappreciated actress.

Jung’s contributions to the field of psychiatry are sometimes overshadowed by those of his elder Viennese counterpart, though this film helps to make up for that oversight. Jung hoped that the psychoanalytic process could become a tool that would not only help individuals overcome their challenges, but could also serve as a means of personal transformation, a noble goal to be sure. With the recent growth in popularity in philosophies like conscious creation and the law of attraction, one can sense Jung’s influence looming in the background, his ideas closely paralleling those of these more contemporary schools of thought. And because of such practices, we can hope that his vision will indeed one day become a reality.

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READ: How To Chill When Times Get Stressed by Ed and Deb Shapiro

Ed and Deb Shapiro — Tue, 20 Dec 2011 08:11:33 +0000

But we couldn’t help wondering how they had coped when confronted with the very different cultures and attitudes of India when they first arrived in the early 1970’s, especially as they and their four small children were living in a small hut with no running water.

“During our early days I was visiting a hill station when I word that I was needed back in Madras, a bus and train journey away,” Don told us. “The next morning, riding the bus down the mountain from the station, we unexpectedly came to a halt. A long line of traffic revealed an accident between a truck and a bus, which was now blocking the road.

“I was concerned about catching my train so I began to try and organize a way through, unfortunately forgetting the legacy the English had left in India: a great reverence of authority. There were buses stopped on both sides of the accident. ‘Could they not,’ I asked, ‘exchange their passengers, turn around and go back to where they had come from, taking the passengers that needed to get there?’

“‘Oh no, sir,’ came the answer, ‘the buses are from different companies and so they would not be able to sort out the money for the tickets and we have no permission for this.’

“Then I discovered that the bus on each side was from the same company! ‘Could they not exchange passengers?’ I tried again.

“‘But no, sir,’ said the drivers, ‘for then each driver would end up at a destination where they were not meant to be, and there is no permission for this to happen.’

“By now I had joined forces with a Swedish man who had a jeep. Together we worked out that if we could fill in the ditch beside the road then the bus could be moved back off the road on to the bank and there would be enough room for the cars to get past. ‘Oh no, sir,’ came the reply, ‘this is not possible. To fill in the ditch we would need permission and we do not have the permission to do this.’

“While all this had been going on, the various occupants of the many buses and cars now waiting on each side of the accident had spread their dhotis (long pieces of cloth like a sarong) and were sitting or resting quietly in the shade under the trees. Eric and I, getting extremely hot and irritated in the midday sun, were the only ones trying to get anything done. Everyone else was quite happy to let events unfold by themselves.

“By now it was 1pm. We decided that if nothing had happened by 2.pm then we would fill in the ditch and move the truck ourselves. At 1:30 pm the police arrived, assessed the situation, and gave the long awaited permission to have the ditch filled in and the truck moved and by 2.pm we were on our way down the hill. I caught my train with a few minutes to spare.”

“So how has India changed you?” we asked.

Don laughed. “If presented with the same circumstances now I would simply spread my dhoti in the shade like everyone else and let the situation take care of itself!”

We are reminded of this story whenever we find ourselves getting worked up about something. It helps us let go and be present in this world of chaos and confusion. Just spread your dhoti is like saying: breathe in, breathe out, and chill. As the Holiday Season can, ironically, be one of the most stressful times going, this is the perfect time to spread your dhoti. Happy Chilled Holidays!

******

Deb is the author of the award-winning YOUR BODY SPEAKS YOUR MIND, Decoding the Emotional, Psychological, and Spiritual Messages That Underlie Illness

Read more from VividLife.me Bloggers:

Who Am I? by Shayne Traviss

Scientists say we’re made of Atoms, pure energy…but where does that come from? World religious heads say we are a creation of God…but where does God come from? Philosophers and Spiritual teachers have entertained theories from; we are one collective energy expressed through many forms, to life is an illusion…but where does that come from?

Stress is Not What You Think by Ed and Deb Shapiro

Ironically, the holiday season can be most stressful time of the year. Imagine you are trying to squeeze some toothpaste out of a tube but you have forgotten to take the top off. What happens? Deb actually did this in one of her most unaware moments and the toothpaste soon found another way out through the bottom of the tube and got all over her. It will force a hole in the side or wherever is the weakest point.

Technorati Tags: appreciation, gratitude, Happiness, Health, inspiration, Meditation, personal development, Personal Growth, self help, self-discovery, Spirituality