I had a major aha about the organizing principle of the universe this past weekend.
I often say Yoga saved my life. Like many, I came to Yoga at a dark time, a time when I felt trapped, isolated and just plain crazy. I would watch the homeless women and prostitutes in my Parkdale neighborhood and wonder how long it would be until I was living on the street with them. (I won’t get into the philosophical discussion that I am them, they are me, we are all one. At the time they terrified me.) I would wonder how many days I could stay up in a row without sleep and actually continue to drive – I think my record was five. I would wonder if at age 25 I was feeling this way what 50 would be like. Would I make it?
Then something happened. Despite the lack of sleep, over-medicating, over-drinking and over-doing something within me dragged my tired body to a Vinyasa Yoga class and a door opened. I felt a way to relax my body and mind. I felt clear and inspired and yet relaxed and grounded. I began to learn to extricate myself from myself but also to love all those parts of me that I feared would drag me into insanity. I learned to live passionately on the edge of stability and freedom. Yoga truly helped me come home to myself and realize that I was not broken nor was anyone else. It is truly a remembrance practice – that all really is well and unfolding perfectly. Which leads me to my aha.
I had a flash moment of insight in a seated twist. As I looked back behind me (symbolically into the past) I realized that everything that I had lived had been perfect and more than perfect perhaps destined. Yoga did not save me it called me. I was thinking I had accidentally discovered this amazing practice at a time when I really felt I needed saving but perhaps the universe was actually conspiring on my behalf to get my ass on the mat all along. You see most of us don’t evolve unless we are on our knees. Maybe the universe gave me a swift kick and then a few more to call me forward to my destiny. What if a higher intelligence, an organizing principle actually created all the chaos, drama, bad choice points, neurotic processes and failed relationships to get me to the Yoga mat and therefore into my deeper knowing, purpose and passion. What if everything that I thought I was healing THROUGH Yoga was what actually GOT ME TO Yoga?
Often we feel life is to be survived. What if all the events were there to actually help you thrive? What if everything that happened happened to bring you to this very moment. The question then becomes what will you do NOW? If there is nothing to overcome, to survive or heal from what will you do NOW with this precious moment and this precious life? If there is nothing wrong with you what then is standing in your way to your own excellence?
We often use our past as a way to stay stuck or to justify our misalignment. What if there was some deep organizing principle that was actually calling you on to clarity, purpose and truth? What if your pain was a mirror to pleasure? By knowing what you don’t want you know really clearly what do want.
Maybe I lost my mind to find my sanity. I gave up control to get true power. I left the party to get drunk on the play. It gives me peace knowing there is a Divine plan unfolding and that I am co-creating in it. I just need to step back and see the opportunity out of what appears to be obstacles. What is the message in the mess? (Thank you Todd Norian for that saying!).
Now I do not wish to learn through sorrow or suffering – that is of the old-world paradigm. I want to know who and what I am and what I want. I don’t need to drink arsenic to know it is not good for me. I am clear, however that all those past moments brought me to this amazing today. Today I look the homeless ladies and beautiful prostitutes in the eyes and smile. I know that we are all one and we are all on our own journey. I no longer fear them or pity them but allow them and affirm them. I assist where I can and love always. Let us appreciate all that got us here and be clear about where we are going to fulfill our own destiny and birth-right as Divine creators.
Join Shasta for an experience of delicious renewal and bliss at the Prana-liscious Yoga and Nature Retreat December 4-10, 2011 at the Blue Osa Retreat Centre in beautiful in Osa Peninsula Costa Rica. Enjoy lush jungle, first rate accommodations and inspiring practice that will enliven every cell and leave your heart singing. Limited capacity. LEARN MORE
And remember to tune into Shasta’s Vivid Life Radio Show Possibility 101 every Wednesday at 4:00 pm eastern standard time on www.vividlife.me.
A celebrated transformational leader and a leading pioneer in embodied spirituality and Yoga, Shasta has inspired hundreds of people through her breakthrough methods for awakening and empowering your inner voice and divine power. Director, founder and senior teacher with Balanced Life Yoga, she delivers public talks, seminars and trainings on evolution and empowerment. She draws on a wide variety of techniques including Yoga, Shamanism, meditation, energy healing, coaching and the Law of Attraction. She is especially appreciated for her passionate way of allowing individuals to make sense of their world and embodied, holistic means to become the change they wish to see.
As early as in her teenage years, Shasta embarked on her journey as a spiritual explorer which led her to India, where she studied yoga, meditation and energy healing. She has studied with many remarkable mentors and she has undergone thousands of hour’s intense practice of meditation and spiritual studies. Shasta has taken every opportunity to become adept in her field through her own practice as well as through extensive training in yoga, group dynamics, meditation and spiritual counseling.