Sunday, February 12, 2012

YOGA POSTURES: Heart Space Yoga – Early 2nd Trimester Prenatal Practice by Krista Bromfield

Yoga is a safe, empowering and relaxing way to prepare for labour and birth. It can help releive the aches and pains associated with changing pregnancy posture, build strength and stamina and maintain a healthy range of motion for the spine, hips and shoulders. The practice of yoga focuses on breath awareness paired with thoughtful movement of the body through poses or ‘asanas’. In this way yoga perfectly compliments preparation for birth and caring for a new baby. If your first trimester involved queasiness, nausea or dizziness it may have been difficult to exercise at all let alone start a yoga program. It is best to wait until these conditions subside before you begin your prenatal yoga journey. It is also very important to get your physician’s consent before starting any exercise program when you are pregnant. The following sequence is a gentle prenatal yoga practice that can be done safely throughout pregnancy. Always listen to your body and do what feels right for you! Namaste Mamma’s!

OPENING MEDITATION: Sit on a folded blanket or meditation cushion. Root through your pelvis and lengthen your spine, drawing your shoulders down and back. Bring one hand to your heart and the other to your baby. Start to breathe in and out through your nose (if nasal passages are not clear you can breathe through your mouth). Draw the breath in and down to where baby is feeling your belly expand three dimentionally. Imagine you could deliver oxygen and prana (vitality, the life force) right to your baby with your breath. Continue this for up to five minutes and then sit quietly for a moment.

 

 

COW/CAT & PELVIC ROCKING: Make your way onto all fours in table top position. Place a blanket under the knees if they are sensitive (you can also come to fists is wrists are sore). As you inhale, gently lower your belly towards the floor (spinal extension) tilting your pelvis so your tailbone lifts up as you gaze forward. Be mindful not to over arch the low back especially as baby grows. As you exhale press into your hands, tuck your tailbone under and round out through your spine (spinal flexion). Repeat for 10 breaths. This pelvic rocking action increases mobility in the low back and pelvis and can help releive low back pain during pregnancy. Always move mindfully and gently in a range of motion that feels good for you and your stage of pregnancy!

 

TAIL WAG: Return to the table top position. Imagine you have a long lizard tail and start to wag it from side to side. As you wag it to the left, press into your right palm and gaze over your left shoulder to look at your imaginary tail. Feel a light stretch in the right side body. As you wag your tail to the right, press into your left palm and gaze over your right shoulder to look at your imaginary tail. Feel a light stretch in the left side body. Continue to sway the hips side to side 10 – 20 times. This action creates space between the pelvis and ribs for baby and increases pelvic and low back mobility. It is great for releiving low back pain even during labour!

 

 

 

SUPPORTED SQUATTING POSE: Step the feet a bit wider than shoulder width apart and squat down with the support of a bolster, blankets or cushions under the pelvis. Make sure you have enough support that the knees, hips, ankles and belly are comfortable. You will feel a stretch in the hips, inner thighs and groins. Opening the muscles that surround the hip joint is an excellent preparation for labour! Bring hands to prayer and let elbows gently apply pressure to help open inner thighs a bit more. Hold for 5 – 10 breaths. The squat can be used with breathing exericses to bring awareness to the pelvic floor and birthing muscles. This pose is also a natural birthing position! (If you have symphysis pubis pain or hemorrhoids you might want more support for your squat ie. more bolsters, blankets, cushions and do not squat down as low!)

 

 

HIP OPENER WITH A TWIST: Bend your left knee out to the side and place your left foot flat on the mat. Stretch your right leg out and energize it by dorsi flexing the ankle (draw toes toward the shin) and engaging your quadricep (right knee cap lifts). Make a stop sign with your left hand and gently press the left elbow against the left inner knee to open the left hip and inner thigh. Place your right hand behind your back on the mat. Inhale to a long spine and then exhale to gently gently rotate the heart to the right and gaze over the right shoulder. As baby grows, be mindful to twist from the heart and not the low or mid belly. This pose continues to open the hips and gently rotates the spine in a healthy range of motion. Keep the spine long and root the pelvis as you inhale, gently rotate from the heart on the exhale. Hold for 5 – 10 breaths and repeat on the other side.

 

Krista Bromfield is a senior teacher at Balanced Life Yoga, a RYT, Can-Fit-Pro PRO Trainer, Mom and Auntie. She has an Honors Degree in Kinesiology and Education, and is the lead Anatomy Instructor for the Balanced Life Yoga Teacher Training Programs. Krista teaches a variety of classes including Power Yoga, Partner Yoga, Kids Yoga, Yog-ahhh, Prenatal Yoga, Stroller Fitness and Mom and Baby Yoga Bootcamp. She also leads Prenatal Yoga and 2UNITE Partner Yoga Teacher Training Certifications. http://www.balancedlifeyoga.ca/

 

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Heart Space Yoga ~ Living Your Yoga by Krista Bromfield
There is a lot of talk this time of year about New Year’s Resolutions and making changes in our lives – maybe you are working with a Sankalpa (a Sanskrit word meaning ‘determination’ or ‘will’) which is a ‘yogic intention’ of sorts. This year I have decided to put my heart into ‘Living My Yoga’. Early on my yoga path I learned that if I fight with my husband, swear at ten people from my car while driving and rush in frustration on my way to yoga class that the positive effects of my post savasana bliss are pretty much,…

 

Why Your Intellect Is An Obstacle to Yoga by Ed and Deb Shapiro

Although it has its roots in Hinduism, yoga transcends the limitations of religion; it stands alone. Yoga means union; it is waking up to the beauty both within ourselves and realizing the sacredness of all life. And it is the expression of love: loving yourself and others, which frees us from a chaotic mind, negativity and neurosis…

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READ: Don’t Put Anyone Out Of Your Heart by Ed and Deb Shapiro

The story goes that, at the time of the Buddha, a group of monks wanted to do a quiet retreat away from the crowds of followers, so the Buddha sent them to a glade in the forest where he said they would be undisturbed.

The monks found their way there and settled down to meditate. But what they didn’t know was that this particular glade was inhabited by a gang of tree spirits who were really upset that the monks had come. And when tree spirits get upset they can be extremely scary, ugly, very smelly and unbelievably noisy, ferociously shrieking all over the place. They did everything they could to spook the hermits and make them leave. And it worked. The monks decided they couldn’t possibly meditate with so many disturbances, so they went back to the Buddha and begged him to let them go somewhere else.

But no. Instead, the Buddha taught them a meditation practice of loving kindness, or metta in Sanskrit, which develops loving kindness towards everyone, including yourself and your enemies. And then he sent the monks back to the forest. His famous words were: This is the only protection you will need.

Thinking the Buddha must be mad the monks reluctantly went back to the glade, sat down and began practicing metta. And the tree spirits, who at first were not at all pleased to see them returning, no longer had any affect on them. For all their antics, the monks just kept sitting there, beaming out kindness. Eventually the spirits were won over by the waves of love and compassion emanating from these robed ones and, far from than chasing them away, the same nasty’s that had been so ferocious now became disciples.

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The question is, who are the tree spirits? Realistically, they are everything that goes on in our own minds—all the doubts, fears, anger, insecurities, and negative thoughts—that constantly undermine our basic goodness, which is innate in all of us. And the point the Buddha was making is that loving kindness—metta–has the capacity to overcome all manner of inner monsters and ghouls and lead us to a true heart opening. Metta is the act of extending our love, kindness and friendship equally towards all beings, proving that love is more powerful than any negative force. Rather than trying to deal with negativity, we cultivate the opposite; seeing and knowing pain, we bring caring and kindness.

We know this sounds so easy: just be kind and loving, how great, what a cool idea. But in practice it’s not always so simple, such as when someone says or does something that is personally critical, derogatory or hurtful. Can metta still flow when the ego-mind is upset? By focusing on loving kindness as a way of living, it shows us all those places that are bound in ego and selfishness; it brings us up against our limitations and boundaries. Where do we meet our edge? Where is our capacity to step over the edge into greater kindness? How genuine is our ability to be altruistic in a difficult situation?

We remember talking with our friend Ram Dass at the time of the Clinton/Dole election. He told us how he had a picture of Bob Dole on his meditation altar as: “Dole needs the most love and compassion as he is the one being so vilified.”

In that act, Ram Dass was practicing true metta. It was an important reminder not to cast anyone out of our hearts, for in the process we are casting out ourselves. If we feel affected by someone being dismissive, critical or hurtful, it is invariably because there is a hook in us for that negativity to grab hold of, a place where it can land and trigger all our hidden feelings of unworthiness, insecurity, and self-doubt.

However, when we extend metta toward someone we are having a hard time with, an extraordinary thing happens: the landing place, or the hook within, begins to dissolve. Then the negativity has no place to go. Metta asks that we stay caring, that we keep our heart open to the situation we are struggling with and all the accompanying annoyance and anger, and hold ourselves with gentle tenderness. Then amazing change is possible.

 

5 minute Loving Kindness Meditation

Begin by breathing into you’re the area of your heart, softening and relaxing with the in-breath, letting go of tension on the out-breath. Hold your name or an image of yourself in your heart and silently repeat: May I be well, may I be happy, may I be filled with loving kindness.

Next, wish all beings be well, wish all beings be happy. If at work you can spend a few moments repeating the names of people you work with and wishing them happiness and joy. On your way home from work reflect on your day and generate loving thoughts to those you meet. At night, think of your family and friends and wish them wellness and happiness: May they be well, may they be happy, may they be filled with loving kindness.

Finish by taking a few deep breaths and slowly opening your eyes, nad have a smile on your face!

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See our award-winning book: BE THE CHANGE, How Meditation Can Transform You and the World, forewords by the Dalai Lama and Robert Thurman, with contributors Jack Kornfield, Jon Kabat-Zinn, Byrone Katie, Jane Fonda, Marianne Williamson, and many others.

If there is one book you read about meditation Be The Change should be the one. Hear about some of the cool people who are doing it and why you should do it too. – Sharon Gannon, founder Jivamukti Yoga.

Our 3 meditation CD’s: Metta—Loving kindness and Forgiveness; Samadhi–Breath Awareness and Insight; and Yoga Nidra–Inner Conscious Relaxation, are available at: www.EdandDebShapiro.com


Ed and Deb Shapiro are the authors of BE THE CHANGE, How Meditation Can Transform You And The World, with forewords by the Dalai Lama and Robert Thurman and Winner of the 2010 Nautilus Gold Book Award. Deb is the author of the bestselling book, YOUR BODY SPEAKS YOUR MIND, winner of the 2007 Visionary Book Award. They are featured bloggers on Oprah.com/spirit, HuffingtonPost.com/Living, and Care2.com. They have 3 meditation CD’s: Metta — Loving Kindness and Forgiveness; Samadhi – Breath Awareness and Insight; and Yoga Nidra – Inner Conscious Relaxation. See: www.EdandDebShapiro.com

 

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Does Your Relationship Ever Get You Down? by Ed and Deb Shapiro

Shortly after we were married we went to India and spent our honeymoon in monasteries and ashrams. We also had a private meeting with the Dalai Lama at his residence in McLeod Ganj, in the foothills of the Himalayas. As Ed recalls: After some thirty minutes of talking with him I was feeling so moved by this gentle and loving man that I didn’t want to leave! I was completely in love with this delightful being. He was so ordinary, sitting between us and holding our hands. Finally, I said to him,…

 

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READ: To Forgive But Not Forget by By Allan Lokos

“To forgive does not necessarily mean to forget. Sometimes to forget is not wise, but to forgive is wise. And it is at times not easy. It can, in fact, be quite challenging. It will come as no surprise that one of the most difficult people to forgive can be yourself. Yet with patience and gentle determination, it can be done.”

We’re going to look at one of the perfection practices known as the paramis (see below). It’s the practice of nekkhamma, which we translate as “renunciation” or “relinquishing.” It means letting go: letting go of material things as well as views, concepts, ideas to which we may have been clinging for years, things that cause us stress, suffering, dukkha.

A simple action that can be helpful in terms of relinquishing is this: on a regular basis—perhaps once or twice a year— choose something to give away. Not some old relic you don’t care about any more, but something you do care about, that has value to you. There’s no need to go overboard by giving away something that will change your lifestyle or will make the kids resent you for the next twenty years. Give away something you like yet are willing to relinquish. During the entire process of selecting and relinquishing, be mindful of your feelings. This can be more challenging than it may at first appear, but it can help us prepare for the day when we must relinquish all that we hold dear.

Now, what about views and concepts? Relinquishing is the ground for practicing “beginner’s mind.” It helps us see things anew, as they really are; to be willing to listen to the thoughts and ideas of others with an open mind. So the relinquishing of thoughts and ideas about which we have been adamant can give us a sense of freedom, joy, and spaciousness. It can feel as if a weight has been taken from our shoulders. However, this also may be easier said than done. We might wonder, “Am I giving up something that I should believe in?” So relinquishing offers an opportunity to look more deeply at our beliefs.

Sometimes we have been holding onto anger or bitterness related to a particular person or event. Something to think about is: What would I have to give up in order to free myself from this bitterness? We might think, “Well, yes, but what he or she did was absolutely unforgiveable.” Consider the possibility, and I am only saying consider the possibility, that maybe nothing is unforgiveable. Maybe there is a way to find forgiveness even for what we have believed for so long to be unforgiveable. Explore this mindfully.

To forgive does not necessarily mean to forget. Sometimes to forget is not wise, but to forgive is wise. And it is at times not easy. It can, in fact, be quite challenging. It will come as no surprise that one of the most difficult people to forgive can be yourself. Yet with patience and gentle determination, it can be done.

Parami (Pali), Paramita (Sanskrit): literally, perfection, or crossing over (to the other shore).

The paramis are practices that can lead one to the perfection of certain virtuous or ennobling qualities. They are practiced as a way of purifying karma and leading the practitioner on a path to enlightenment. In the Theravada tradition, the ten paramis are dana (generosity), sila (morality), nekkhamma (relinquishing), panna (wisdom), viriya (effort), khanti (patience), sacca (truthfulness), adhitthana (determination), metta (lovingkindness), upekkha (equanimity). In the Mahayana there are six paramitas: generosity, morality, patience, effort, concentration, and wisdom.

It is interesting to note that the parami of generosity comes first, before the other practices, even morality. Some commentators suggest that the list begins with the easiest practice and becomes progressively more challenging. Another view is that until one sees the interconnected nature of phenomena and has a heart open to the needs of all beings, the other paramis can remain beyond reach. With practice, the virtuous qualities become stronger and support one another. Generosity supports relinquishing, which supports morality, which supports truthfulness, which supports wisdom, which supports equanimity, and so forth.

The paramis are seen as the heart of our true nature but greed, hatred, and delusion cause them to become somewhat blurred. Practicing the paramis is said to help us see in a different, more beneficial way. His Holiness the Dalai Lama has said, “These deeds, called the perfections, constitute the essential and comprehensive path to enlightenment, combining method and wisdom.” Thus the paramis are important practices for one who seeks to become an awakened being and to end the cycle of samsara, or cyclic existence. The key point to remember is that the paramis are offered not as philosophy but as practices. To be effective, practices need to be practiced.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ALLAN LOKOS is the founder and guiding teacher of The Community Meditation Center in New York City. He is the author of Patience: The Art of Peaceful Living and Pocket Peace: Effective Practices for Enlightened Living. His writing has appeared in The New York Times, Tricycle magazine, The Huffington Post, Beliefnet, Back Stage newspaper, and the anthology, Audacious Creativity. He has taught at Columbia University Teachers College, Albert Einstein College of Medicine, Marymount College, The Rubin Museum, New York Insight Meditation Center, The New York Open Center, Tibet House USA, and Insight Meditation Community of Washington. http://www.cmcnewyork.org/

 

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Forgiveness is Choosing to Love by Pragito Dove

Do you find it easy to forgive people who have hurt or abused you in some way? I didn’t until I started to understand that I was hurting myself more by maintaining a tight knot of resentment and anger towards the people who had wronged me. As I learned to love myself, and make loving myself more important than hating the other person, a profound shift happened within me. I felt more loving not only towards myself, but towards everyone and all situations in my life. This shift in perspective produced  a feeling state of relaxation, ease, and trust that all was right with my world,..
How Can You Love Me When I Don’t Love Myself

How can anyone love me is an honest observation of what many people have hidden in their psyche. We all put up a good front, we want people to think we are normal, but what lies lurking beneath the surface is another story and it may not be as pretty as we want the world to think it is,…

 

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READ: Mindful Living ~ Life in Verse by Jacquelyn O’Brien

What’s your first thought when you wake up in the morning? You’ve probably heard it said that you can choose to start your day with ‘Good God, morning!’ or ‘Good morning, God.’ It’s certainly true that the way you begin can set the tone for the whole day and once the tone is established it can be very difficult to change.

I invite you to try a wonderful and simple technique to help you start your day in a positive  and mindful way. When you wake up recite to yourself, either from memory or from a note by your bed, the following little verse, or gatha, from Thich Nhat Hanh.

Waking this morning, I smile.
Twenty-four brand new hours are before me.
I vow to live fully in each moment,
And to look at all beings with eyes of compassion.

Thich Nhat Hanh teaches that, as a young monk, he wrote this down and stuck it to his mosquito net so that it was the first thing he saw when he woke in the morning. It’s a wonderful way to begin the day with a moment of slowing down and setting a good intention.

I have found gathas incredibly useful for focussing my mind when I’m moving through my day and particularly during the more mundane activities of life. After all it’s at these times that we often allow our minds to wander down roads of worry and fear. In trying to live with mindfulness we attempt to prevent this from happening and gathas can be very helpful.

For example, when walking from one meeting to another replace the worries, false frettings and concerns that normally arise with a favourite gatha.

The mind can go in a thousand directions,
But on this beautiful path, I walk in peace.
With each step, a cool wind blows.
With each step, a flower blooms.

To focus on a gatha and prevent the monkey mind taking us down the rabbit hole of a thousand imagined and unlikely disasters is to remove a great deal of the worry and stress from the day. Try this simple technique and see what a difference it makes to you.

You can find a gatha for most daily activities in the wonderful ‘Present Moment, Wonderful Moment’ card and book set by Thich Nhat Hanh but you can also have fun making up your own. Good luck watering the seed of mindfulness in your life.

Many blessings and best wishes.

Namaste,

 

jacquelyn

 

Jacquelyn is a 500 hour Registered Yoga Teacher and Reiki Level Two practitioner. Yoga has helped her to overcome paralyzing fears and chronic pain and find her true purpose in life. Her focus is on encouraging those around her to have patience, kindness and compassion for themselves and the courage to stand, fearless, in their own light. Jacquelyn has studied meditation and mindfulness in the Shambhala tradition and with Thich Nhat Hanh. She teaches Gentle Yoga, Chakra Flow Yoga, EMpower Yoga, Beginners Yoga, Power Yoga, Learn to Meditate and a variety of workshops. www.balancedlifeyoga.ca

 

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As we think so we become by Ed and Deb Shapiro

Most of us tend to think of our bodies and minds as separate entities and treat them as such: we feed and water our body, take it for walks and give it exercise; we feed our mind with ideas and amuse ourselves with various kinds of entertainment. If anything goes wrong we go to someone to sort it out, such as a doctor to fix our body or a therapist to treat our mind…

 

The Awakening Man ~ A Portrait of Possibility for Humankind by Jeff Brown

The awakening man is conscious, heartfully defined. Through his eyes, being conscious is not a cerebral construct, nor an intellectual exercise bereft of feeling. It is a felt experience, an ever-expanding awareness that moves from the heart outward. It is feeling God, not thinking God. The new man is always in process, awakening through a deepening interface with the world of feeling. He continues to strive for a more heartfelt and inclusive awareness…

 

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READ: Why am I Still Depressed and Angry? by Panache Desai

There is a common fallacy that is undermining your journey into wholeness and authenticity. I’m a bit of a gunslinger in this territory, but it is important that you are empowered in this fundamental truth; when you are finally able to grab that brass ring of spiritual accomplishment, you are still going to experience sadness, depression, fear and anger.

I’m going to step out on a bit of a ledge here and conjecture that even the Dalai Lama and Eckhart Tolle get irritated now and again. Recently we watched Oprah up-close and personal in her series “Season 25: Oprah Behind the Scenes.” Oprah is an amazingly light on this planet and week after week we witnessed the full range of emotions she still experiences. While I don’t call myself a spiritual master, tens of thousands who have experienced vibrational transformation through me define me as such. And I still feel anger, sadness, and fear.

There is nothing wrong with anger, sadness and depression and your experience of them does indicate that you are broken or need fixing.

We are energetic beings. Highly subject to and influenced by the frequencies that are bathing the planet as well as the corresponding energies that are being lovingly stirred up within. The vibration of our planet is in an accelerated state of evolution. You have witnessed the tangible results of these shifting energies in wildly changing weather patterns, a sharp increase in catastrophic weather-related disasters, global instability, financial crises, and the collapse of global systems and structures. If this is how an entire planet responds, imagine the tug and pull on your sensitive being?

Vibrational change, which in reality is vibrational increase, pushes your unresolved vibrational density (the emotional and psychological blocks lodged within your being) into the light of day. Your sadness, depression, anger and fear are energies that are simply looking for release. Each emotion is an energy within your body wanting to be in motion and rise to the surface to be EMBRACED by you. But the number of years that you’ve shamed, ignored or stuffed them is the degree to which they’ve created blockages within your system, growing out-of-proportion to life’s unfolding circumstances, and eventually causing illness and disease.

As we navigate this time of accelerated evolution the truth of your energetic state (your sadness, worries, fears, anger and depression…) is being revealed to you so that you may consciously experience it, embrace it and evolve. Just as a mother lovingly burps a child to release the pent-up bubbles and gas in her baby’s system, the Divine is lovingly embracing you so that all that is stuck or churning within your energetic field may flow through you to be released. This is the true work of inner alchemy and ascension.

If what you desire is a greater level of authenticity within yourself and those you love, you have no choice but to embrace this process and feel what is inside of you. But you do have a choice as to how you experience it, and what you do with it.

One choice is to further suppress or repress your emotions or blame others as the source or reason for your state of being. Doing so increases your vibrational density and keeps you firmly stuck in victimhood with your stories, reasons and justifications while holding you hostage with the “could haves” or “should haves” of life.

Alternatively you may choose to be empowered through vibrational transformation, knowledge, and practice, and find peace with these emotional states by lovingly embracing them as a part of yourself.

Here are some steps to help you begin navigating your fear, anger and depression:

Breathe with Conscious Awareness: In the face of overwhelming emotion you cut the oxygen source to your body by unknowingly holding your breath or breathing very shallowly, keeping you in a heightened state of contraction. Completely relax your body and continue to breathe deeply.

Place Yourself In Present Moment Awareness: When emotion strikes, the stories and beliefs that keep old feelings in place roar to life. You are trapped in an old reality that most likely has nothing to do with what’s unfolding. Get out of your head and anchor yourself in the present moment. Focus on your feet and feel the connection with the ground. Wiggle your hands and feet to establish you in the present. Even the briefest break from the saga unfolding in your brain can disengage you from the past and allow your beingness to support you in the now.

Consciously Name and Acknowledge the Emotion: The instant you name the feeling and become aware that you are experiencing something, you are provided the spaciousness to remain open to the flow of the experience. “Wow, I’m experiencing my anger right now,” is a doorway to awareness as you flow with the energy of the emotion.

There is an End: Sometimes in the midst of emotion, you feel like it is bigger than you. Every experience is finite, it has a beginning and an end while your true nature is infinite. Don’t be afraid. Fully experience the feeling and know it will end.

Every emotion originates from source.  Oneness is inclusive of every feeling, emotion and experience – yes even anger, rage, sadness and depression.  Trust in this knowing.

Panache Desai is an inspirational visionary and contemporary spiritual master whose gift of vibrational transformation has inspired and shifted the lives of tens of thousands. He shares eternal truths, inspirational insights, and vibrational tools to create the life of your dreams. Panache is a modern-day avatar who acts as a direct link to Divine consciousness empowering people of all ages, economic and educational backgrounds to transform their lives by connecting them with their limitless Divine nature. Young, hip and funny, Panache brings his global community together weekly via LIVE webcasting.  http://www.panachedesai.com/

 

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I see all of life unfolding in an upwardly evolving spiral. And its momentum is continually moving you forward. Even those events that appear to be catastrophic are propelling you onward although you swear they are giant steps backwards. Bad marriages, crappy jobs, financial challenges, health crises, the loss of a loved one… each appears as a debilitating or even disastrous set-back, further complicated by the stress and emotions that flood every sensory point within your body.  Fear of what’s unfolding and the mind’s need to…
DON’T BEAT YOURSELF UP by Rick Hanson, Ph. D.
Are you hard on yourself? The Practice: Don’t beat up yourself. Why? The previous JOT – admit fault and move on – was about our relationship with other people. This JOT applies the same practice to ourselves. Most people know their less than wonderful qualities, such as too much ambition (or too little), a weakness for wine or cookies, something of a temper, or an annoying tendency to rattle on about pet interests. We usually know when we make mistakes, get the facts wrong, could be more skillful, or deserve to feel remorseful.

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