Be the boss when you give birth – a want list to the birth clinic

March 3, 2010 by enlightened
Filed under Parents, • Feature

VividLife.me Contributors

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Technorati Tags: alternative birth, conscious birth, conscious parenting, conscious parents, conscious pregnancy, enlightened birth

A Wake up call to the World

February 17, 2010 by enlightened
Filed under Parents, • Feature

2 Comments

It is indeed wonderful to LIVE in this fantastic time of awakening!

Yet – at the same time we have to participate in this awakening – WE ARE THE CHANGE !

We have a tremendous resource in our hearts – LOVE…

LOVE is the future of this planet.

LOVE is the hope for our children and grandchildren.

What if we join forces and create a movement of enlightenment, a conscious parenting movement ?

You have a reservoir of love power, you have what it takes to change the world to a planet of love.

Your thoughts and actions are very important – YOU ARE IMPORTANT !

Be an active part of this paradigm shift!

And we really wish that people like you join the team that we are building, together we can make a difference in the world.

We know that you have a lot to share and offer.

You are a messenger of love and light!

You have a huge treasure chest in your heart.

That chest abounds with shimmering jewels and diamonds!

Our goal with “Let`s start a conscious parenting movement” is to reach out a hand to those who are afraid and to those of the parents who are living an enlightened life with their children, and to those who needs support. The old ways of parenting are not working – they never have.

We have noticed that there are so many wonderful parents with amazing solutions, so we thought, why not join forces and create a team that can come together and create something BIG – A PARADIGM SHIFT in child development and the awakening of parents.

Although most parents do their very best, we have created societies with problems in all areas of life, be it health, education, environment, economy, law and human relations.

We have no time to wait for the Governments of the world, parents must act NOW!

TOGETHER WE ARE STRONG – THERE ARE NO PROBLEMS – ONLY SOLUTIONS AND IT IS UP TO US TO SOLVE THEM…

BECAUSE WE HAVE ALL THE SOLUTIONS INSIDE US…

We are our children`s last hope…and it all starts with us, the parents.

We have to change- we have to do things differently.

We have to wake up NOW!

When it comes to parenting, we have to become conscious about what works, and what does not work!

We need to find ways to communicate to facilitate our children’s happiness, health, self-esteem and intelligence.

Communication through the heart is the solution, treating our children with mutual respect and equality.

What if we start to live a holistic way concerning health, education, upbringing, economy, spirituality and every other aspect of life?

What if we change our thoughts, words and actions?

What if love and to give would be our guidelines?

What if we regarded the world as one family?

Let us work together so we can hear the children laugh and play in the future too.

Let us work together so we can communicate with our children with love, respect and patience.

Life is meant to be joyful – a precious gift…and the children are showing us how all the time.

We can not ignore what they are telling us anymore – they speak the truth.

And they are calling out that we have to wake up!

The children are the peacemakers, and they are praying for us to wake up.

Children don`t see boundaries or nationalities, color of the skin, religions, rich or poor…they just see love and truth.

Children see ONE WORLD.

It is up to us to learn from our children, and start a positive movement that prevents our future to be a shadow of a silhouette.

Our group is about inspiration, love, parenting and children.

It is about learning from each other, sharing, a holistic lifestyle, and anything that helps us be a better parent.

The children are Gods precious gifts to Humanity.

Can they relax and trust that we create a future in peace, love and harmony?

Parents are waking up all over the world.

But most of all it is the mothers who see the new possibilities.

Because the love connection between mother and child is beyond words.

And the mothers see, listen and feel with an open heart.

And it is the mothers who will shine the light in a world in need.

We, the parents, are the bringers of light.

And we are the ones who are giving life to the peacemakers.

And we are the ones who are the role models for our children.

And if we change our minds – we will change the future for our children.

YOU – THE BRINGER OF LIGHT – LET US TAKE CARE OF THE CHILDREN OF GOD, LET US JOIN FORCES AND MAKE A MOVEMENT!

LET US START A CONSCIOUS PARENTING MOVEMENT!

YOU ARE THE ONE WE HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR!

VividLife.me Contributors

Pearl Shanti and Andiran Lodur-Lionheart

Join our group on Facebook:

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=201573109618&ref=search&sid=100000248395261.3449746649..1

Our Fan-page:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Kviteseid-Norway/conscious-parenting/182281227970?ref=search&sid=100000248395261.3449746649..1

Our blog:
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Technorati Tags: child development, conscious parenting, conscious parents, crystal children, indigo children, Parents, rainbow children

Tags: child development, conscious parenting, conscious parents, crystal children, indigo children, Parents, rainbow children

How to Be Good Partners in Parenting by Rick Hanson & Jan Hanson

February 4, 2010 by vividlife
Filed under Parents, • Feature

7 Comments

Shortly after everyone had signed the Declaration of Independence, one of those present is believed to have said: “Gentlemen, we must hang together now. Or we will all hang separately!”

Much the same is true for parents. Once the baby arrives, there is is an urgent need for teamwork. There is just too much for one person to do alone, and each parent has a big stake in what the other one does with the child. Decisions have to be made now that could be postponed prior to children.

It’s Hard to Stay Two When Baby Makes Three

But working together cooperatively can be hard. The stresses on mothers are well-known. Physically, there are the demands of pregnancy, labor, nursing, sleep disturbance, and long hours of work. Tending to children and a home contains all the conditions known to cause dangerous levels of psychological stress in the workplace: constant interruptions, little control over what happens next, needing to learn new skills on the fly, juggling multiple tasks at once, difficulty finishing anything, giving instructions that are repeatedly ignored, little respite, long hours, isolation, and low status. Then add the emotional intensity, such as worries when a baby is sick, anger at a three-year-old who won’t do what you say, or hurt at the rejection of a teenager.

And fathers get stressed too. For example, like lots of men, Rick felt an urgent need to provide for our family that drove him to work long hours and carry a mental load of financial pressure. Many men want to be a decent father, at least as good and maybe better than their own dads, so they worry about the kids too. They get affected emotionally when their children cry or squabble, or when their wives are unhappy.

As a result, both parents are often worn out and irritable, making it harder to keep a clear head or civil tongue. They may have different ideas about how to raise children, spend time and money, or paint the bedroom Some personalities don’t like sharing power or accepting the influence of another, but you have to do both when you’re all roped together on the long climb of raising a family. Negotiating takes skills that many of us lack, and they don’t just come with a birth certificate. People may have different communication styles or aims in relationship; for example, some place a high value on feeling connected while others prize separation and independence.

In particular, men and women often differ in how they communicate. As a generalization with individual exceptions:

Male style — Terse, targeted on a single topic, focused on tasks and outcomes, and impersonal
Female style — Expansive, moving from topic to topic, relationship-focused, and personal

Plus many fathers are, frankly, mediocre teammates: uncomfortable with young children, dismissive of the work or stress of mothering, unwilling to learn parenting skills, or willing to do what they are told but not take initiative. Consequently, the average mother has a total workload of fifteen to twenty hours per week more than her partner. Even when a man has the best of intentions, his partnership with the mother can be strained by financial pressures, workplace policies, her interference with or over-criticism of his approach to the kids, or children who continue to go to her.

Conflicts related to children have a special intensity because of their primal importance. If they happen again and again, positions harden, emotions become increasingly raw and bitter — and it gets more difficult to work through issues.

Many couples do find ways to rear their children consistently, share the load fairly, forge a true partnership of the heart, and resolve issues with civility, empathy, and skill. But if they don’t, hurts and resentments grow, the home atmosphere gets too cold or too hot, children are affected, and families can come apart. For example, Rick knew a couple, Danielle and Alex, that had three children in six years. Alex threw himself into his job as a sales manager, working late and traveling frequently. Danielle wanted more help at home, plus more say in how Alex spent his time and their money. He was prickly about anyone telling him what to do. Danielle got more and more frustrated, but the madder she got, the more Alex withdrew, and after awhile they stopped talking with each other about anything serious. She thought he needed drugs. He thought she needed drugs. Their love evaporated until nothing was left in their hearts for each other but dry, stony ground. Like roughly a fifth of new parents, they separated before their first child reached kindergarten.

Even when parents are managing to keep living together, we have heard numerous arguments that go essentially like this:

She: You’re never home. And when you are, your mind is elsewhere.

He: You don’t appreciate how hard I work.

She: Hah! You don’t appreciate how hard I work, either.

He: I have to pull those hours to make the money that keeps us afloat. Everybody else stays just as late. If I left early, I’d feel like a quitter.

She: If you had a heart attack and had to leave at 5:30 no matter what, you’d all adjust and the business would go on the same. We need you home. I need you, the kids need you.

He: I help out. I do a hell of a lot more than my dad ever did — or yours.

She: So what? It’s still less than you should be doing. When you’re at work, I’m working, too, here at home. And when you do get home — usually later than you promised! — you read or watch TV and avoid helping. Plus you always have to be told what to do. I feel like it’s all up to me. It’s not my child, it’s ours.

He: It wouldn’t be all up to you if you would ever let me do things my way! And it’s just for a few more years. I’m building up a nest egg that will be good for all of us. Can’t you see that? Can’t you just handle things meanwhile? What’s so hard about that?

She: Of course I can handle it alone. But I don’t want to. These are precious years. Your son will never be two again, or three or four. We can make more money later, but we can’t ever get these years back. Besides, I don’t know if we’ll be able to get us back.

What Makes a Good Partnership?

A good partnership has these characteristics:

Alignment — Shared values about life, family, childrearing, the roles of mothers and fathers, and the involvement of the father in childrearing and housework; specific agreement about parenting practices, schedules, and finances; backing up each other with the kids
Fairness — A workload that is similar in its hours and stresses
Ownership — Shared, mutual responsibility for planning, worries, and important decisions
Trust — Agreements are kept or renegotiated; each person is reliable and sensible
Communication — Civility; empathy; emotional support; open, explicit, direct, authentic conversation; skillful negotiation.

The first four are about content: what gets done. The last one is about process: how parents talk with each other — and it is probably the most important, because when a mother and father have good process, they can usually find a way to work out or live with whatever differences in content lie between them.

A good partnership is also flexible, pragmatic, and tolerant of differences. In particular:

Alignment means largely shared values, not exact agreement on every point; it is a work in progress as new issues emerge, from getting an infant to sleep through the night to curfews in high school. Some differences in parenting styles are fine and prepare children for the various kinds of people who will be their teachers or supervisors. Even though it is generally a good idea to support each other in front of the kids, sometimes a tactful intervention is called for if the other parent is going overboard or losing control.
Fairness allows for complementary roles: perhaps he does more yardwork and she more laundry. But beware the common pattern in which the mother’s tasks are more unpredictable, emotionally charged, three-things-at-once, and continually interrupted while the father’s are more contained, scheduled when he wants to do them, focused, and carried to completion; that makes her role more stressful.
Ownership refers to the “Board of Directors” level of managing a family, and different boards function in different ways. For example, if both parents agree to it, it is fine if the mother is the one who keeps in mind many of the details of the children’s lives (the common arrangement), as long as she feels that her husband is mentally and emotionally engaged and helpful when she wants to talk about something. The mother may also take leadership and initiative for more family matters (such as relationships with friends and relatives or the kids’ health) while the father shoulders more responsibility for making money, overlooking their savings or investments, and dealing with the cars — another common way of doing things. But dads need to let themselves worry about the things their wives worry about; when we are bothered about something, it is upsetting to feel that we are the only one who has that concern. And fathers also need to take leadership about some aspects of raising their children, such as religious or character education, school placement, or homework.
Trust can be recreated if a promise is not kept. We all blow it sometimes. But trust is fragile and profoundly important in a marriage. It boils down to performance, not good intentions: Do you do what you say you are going to do at least 98% of the time? If you are impeccable and delivering the reasonable goods to your partner, you are on a much stronger footing to ask for what you want from him or her.
Communication means a lively, real process that inevitably has some misunderstandings, heated arguments, breakdowns and deadlocks. Good arguments have a kind of trajectory in which the parties begin with disagreement and misunderstanding and emotional heat, yet conclude with a common plan, clarity about where each stands, and peace between them. The crux is where things end up, not where they start.

Assessment of Your Partnership

Different couples have different kinds of partnerships. By understanding your strengths and weaknesses as a team, you can build on what works well and start shoring up what could use some improvement.

Please take a look at the assessment in the box. You and your partner can fill it out individually and then talk about it, or you alone could do it. If each of you do the assessment, we have some suggestions about how to talk about it from our own, sometimes bumpy, experience:

First, focus on the experience of yourself and your partner, rather than disagreements about how each other acts, the circumstances, justifications, or what to do. It is hard to argue about how you feel; no one can tell us what our feelings are or what it’s like for us when something happens.
Second, try to resolve what the facts are. Do not get bogged down in disagreements about what happened the past. Rather, start tracking what the facts are right now. For example, if there is a question about who is doing what, for a week each person can keep a log of his or her activities: this is usually very eye-opening, and we will say more about this exercise in future columns.
Third, each person should make at least one agreement about how he or she could be a better partner. Try to focus more on what you could do better than on any grievances you may have with your partner.

Developing Good Communication

In future columns, we will describe how to develop good communication, starting with civility and empathy. Then we will show how to use those skills to work on the specific issues of alignment, fairness, ownership, and trust many couples have.

* * * * *

Assessment of Your Partnership

Please consider the past month. Unless otherwise indicated, please mark the questions below using the following scale: 0 Not at all or very little 1 Somewhat 2 Very much

When you are done, take a look at the overall picture. Are there many more “2’s” than “1’s” and “0’s”? Also look at specific questions: Where are the zeros? (Note that this scoring is reversed in the negative characteristics section of the COMMUNICATION part, where high scores are a problem.)

Also consider where you and your partner view things very differently, especially if one person’s score is a “0″ while the other’s is a “2.” In these cases, you might agree to rate the question on a daily or weekly basis, both to come together on how you rate things as well as to have things go better from now on.

ALIGNMENT

How much do you and your partner have similar values about:

Life? ______ The importance of family? ______ How to raise children? ______ The involvement of the father in childrearing? ______ In housework? ______

How much do you and your partner agree about childrearing:

Sleeping? ______ Eating? ______ Discipline? ______ Daily routines? ______ School and homework? ______ TV, Nintendo, computer games? ______

Religious instruction? ______ Allowances and money? ______ Friends? ______ Handling squabbles between siblings? ______ After school activities? ______ Sexuality? ______ Drugs and alcohol? ______

Supporting each other with the kids? ______

Balance of nurturing and challenging children? ______

Your tone of voice? ______

How much do you and your partner act in agreement about:

Spending money? ______ When to get home from work? ______

How to spend time in the evenings or weekends? ______

FAIRNESS

When you add up everything you each do, including tending to children, scheduling activities, housework, managing family affairs, or going to a job, do you and your partner have the same total workload? ______

If not, about how many hours each week is one partner “on task” more than the other: _____________ hours.

Considering all of the activities you each engage in, is your stress level about the same? ______

OWNERSHIP

How much do you and your partner share responsibility for the children’s:

Health? ______ Schooling? ______ Physical development? ______

Psychological development? ______ Moral or religious development? ______

Relationships with friends? ______ With siblings? ______

How much do you and your partner share responsibility for:

Making enough money? ______ Bookkeeping and paying the bills? ______ Paperwork? ______ Tax returns? ______ Home maintenance? ______

Figuring out insurance or loans? ______ Planning vacations? ______

Relationships with relatives? ______ With friends and others? ______

Other important decisions? ______

How engaged are you with your partner’s worries and concerns? ______

How engaged is your partner with your worries and concerns? ______

TRUST

How much do you and your partner keep your agreements with each other about:

[put your assessment of your partner in parentheses]

Parenting? ______ Housework? ______ Time home from work? ______

Spending time together? ______ Spending money? ______

Romantic or sexual behavior? ______ Other matters? ______

COMMUNICATION

How much do you and your partner communicate with each other in a way that is:

[put your assessment of your partner in parentheses]

Civil? ______ Explicit, direct, and clear? ______ Authentic? ______ Open? ______

On topic? ______ Accurate? ______ Aimed at a resolution? ______

Positive in tone? ______ Warm or friendly? ______

Understanding or empathic? ______ Light-hearted or humorous? ______

Appreciative or complimentary? ______ Affectionate? ______

Supportive? ______ Helpful? ______

How much do you and your partner communicate with each other in a way that is:

[put your assessment of your partner in parentheses]

Critical? ______ Complaining? ______ Irritated, resentful, or angry? ______

Blaming? ______ Inflammatory in language? ______ Disdainful? ______

Exaggerated? ______ Wandering off topic? ______ Defensive? ______

Hinting or indirect? ______ Confused, murky? ______ Guarded? ______

Inauthentic, putting on a mask, hard to read? ______ Cold? ______

Aimed more at proving your point than at a resolution? ______

How well do you and your partner negotiate your disagreements? ______

VividLife.me Contributor

Rick Hanson, Ph.D., is a neuropsychologist, a meditation teacher and is a weekly contributor to psychology-today.com. A summa cum laude graduate of the University of California at Los Angeles and a graduate of the Community Dharma Leader training program of Spirit Rock, he teaches at Spirit Rock, Sati Center, and other organizations. He and his wife have two children and live in Marin County, CA.

www.buddhasbrain.com

Technorati Tags: conscious parenting, good parents, good partners, Growth, inspiration, Jan Hanson, parenting advice, Parents, partnered in parenting, Relationships, Rick Hanson

Tags: conscious parenting, good parents, good partners, Growth, inspiration, Jan Hanson, parenting advice, Parents, partnered in parenting, Relationships, Rick Hanson

Children are Mankind`s Precious Gifts – does the society value them ?

February 3, 2010 by enlightened
Filed under Parents, • Feature

2 Comments

The newborn baby is looking out, ready to embrace the wonderful world, a new life.

The baby is coming from a place free of limitations, materialism, violence and war. He is enveloped in a glow of safety, unconditional love, the light and the freedom to be…himself. The devoted love a baby brings to the earth enchants us all.

But pretty soon he meets the rules, fears and limitations of society. His perfect, little body is injected with poison. The poison is called vaccines. The vaccines are supposed to protect against diseases, but they break down the perfect immune system.

The child grows up, and gets reactions, maybe behavior problems, because of the injections. He is labeled and diagnosed, and administrated more poisons so that society can accept him.

Children with special gifts – even though they have not been vaccinated, are diagnosed. More and more children are diagnosed, and more and more types of diagnoses are invented.

Their unique talents and gifts, which they are born with, are suppressed in order to fit the small, square boxes which are labeled “normal” by society.

And if someone dares to be different – he is cut, adjusted and shaped to fit society`s “needs “. And the child becomes even more unbalanced because of this stress and strain.

And then people say: ” There is something wrong with this child since he can not adjust to the society”…

But isn`t there something wrong with society – since it is not able or willing to see or accept the child for who he is ?

Why rectify something that originally was perfect ?

There are enlightened cultures that see this. There are parents who remove their children from schools and kindergartens , and choose home school instead.
These conscious parents can “see” their children and their needs. They can see the greatness in their children, the love, light and unlimited potential. These parents shield their children from vaccines, TV, junk food and other limitations and programs

However, it is oftentimes the enlightened families who are in danger of being reported to the social security office in the western world, accused of child neglect due to lack of ordinary school and lack of vaccinations…and in some countries the children will be taken away from their parents because of this.

And sometimes parents with home school are even accused of being a sect…

This is not about right or wrong – it is about what works and what does not work.

We do not have to be geniuses to conclude, when we look at the world, that the methods in use do not work.

Do we really know the consequences of forcing children into a school system that is designed to create obedient consumers and soldiers ?

What we give the children are illusions and limitations.

If the existing school system works, why are there not more geniuses amongst us ?

Instead we can observe that the school system has “ dumbed us down. “ We can not force knowledge into a students head. Even the word “education” is misunderstood. It is derived from Latin, meaning to extract from within…

To learn by rote just shows that a person knows certain facts at a certain time.

If knowledge is taught in a playful and joyful manner, babies can achieve amazing results. They prove that they can learn reading, mathematics and several languages. And they love it !

Why ? Because they are taught with love, patience and lots of praise !

More and more parents are now waking up, and together we are strong. We are all children of God.

And our children are our precious jewels, Gods gift to Humanity.

Parents have come to be givers of life…the most beautiful joy in the world.

VividLife.me Contributors

Pearl Shanti and Andiran Lodur-Lionheart

Our blog:

http://enlightenedchildren.com/

You will find us on Facebook conscious parenting Fan-Page:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Kviteseid-Norway/conscious-parenting/182281227970?ref=search&sid=100000248395261.3449746649..1

And our group on Facebook:

http://www.facebook.com/#/group.php?gid=201573109618&ref=search&sid=100000248395261.3449746649..1

Technorati Tags: conscious parenting, gifted children, immune system, Parents, vaccinations

Tags: conscious parenting, gifted children, immune system, Parents, vaccinations

The Miracle

January 6, 2010 by enlightened
Filed under Parents, • Headline

2 Comments

The miracle is you…

Because you are a Messenger…
YOU have a heart with an abundance of love – longing for a new enlightened age…
You have always known that there is a deeper meaning with life…
You have always been seeking beyond the beyond…
You have always been seeking the truth…
That`s why we have met each other on the path of life…it is no coincidence that we have met, no – my friend…there is a higher purpose with our friendship…
BECAUSE you are a MIRACLE !
Imagine – you have something very important to give to the world…something unique coming from you…from your big heart…
YOU - you are the Messenger of Light..you have something magnificent to share !
Imagine if you would invite all your friends to “Lets start a conscious parenting movement ” (our group on Facebook) – and imagine that in this way you can help change the world…because the world can not continue the way it is now…
THE CHILDREN say NO !
And they say it as loud as they can…
so that even the deaf can HEAR…
and the blind can SEE…
We have to think in ANOTHER WAY…
The old ways are not working anymore…
Actually they never have…
So let us together be the change the world is waiting for !
Let us CHANGE the old parenting paradigm NOW !
And it all starts with us – THE PARENTS – WE ARE THE CHANGE !

We have noticed that there are so many wonderful parents with amazing solutions,
so we thought, why not join forces and create a team that can come together and create something BIG – A PARADIGM SHIFT in child development and the awakening of parents.

And this paradigm shift concerns the parents of all children, no matter if they are rich or poor, handicapped, race or religion or if they have adopted their children.

Join this team – and let us create ANOTHER world.

Because WE are the Ones that we have been waiting for !
Let us do it NOW !
Share this with as many people as you like…it is a pleasure…we do this for free…there is no money involved…only our time…And the love for our children…the Children of the Earth…yours…mine…they are OUR children…
Our common future…and the world needs YOU !
Because you have something unique to contribute…YOURSELF !

All is love

VividLife.me Contributors

Pearl Shanti and Andiran

Join our group on Facebook: ”Lets start a conscious parenting movement ” !

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=201573109618&ref=search&sid=100000248395261.3449746649..1

Or our fan-page on Facebook:

www.facebook.com/pages/Kviteseid-Norway/conscious-parenting/182281227970?ref=search&sid=100000248395261.3449746649..1#/pages/Kviteseid-Norway/conscious-parenting/182281227970

And visit our blog: www.enlightenedchildren.com

Technorati Tags: child development, conscious parenting, paradigm shift, parent support group

Tags: child development, conscious parenting, paradigm shift, parent support group

DISEASE DRIVEN EARNINGS: Is It Time for a New Prescription For Generation Rx?

January 6, 2010 by vividlife
Filed under Body, Parents, • Feature

VividLife.me Contributor

Robyn O’Brien

According to the New York Times, Robyn O’Brien is “food’s Erin Brockovich”. As the founder of AllergyKids, an organization designed to protect the 1 in 3 American children with autism, allergies, ADHD and asthma, Robyn has appeared on Good Morning America, CBS Evening News with Katie Couric and CNNhighlighting the role that chemicals in our food supply are having on our health. Born and raised in a conservative Texas family on supply side economics and the Wall Street Journal, Robyn earned a Fulbright Fellowship, an MBA and served as an equity analyst on a multibillion dollar fund prior to moving to Boulder, Colorado with her husband and four children. Additional articles can be found on her blog, FOOD POLITICS, at www.allergykids.com

Technorati Tags: ADHD, Disease Driven Earnings, Generation Rx, Money Driven Medicine, Robyn O'Brien

Tags: ADHD, Disease Driven Earnings, Generation Rx, Money Driven Medicine, Robyn O'Brien

When Courage and Conscience Collide

December 17, 2009 by vividlife
Filed under Body, Editor's Pick, Growth, Parents, • Headline

3 Comments

I was raised on capitalism and the Wall Street Journal.

As a child, my family celebrated the birth of Reaganomics the way one would have celebrated the birth of a child. There was prosperity to be had by all — if only we believed.

My father, like so many of his era, fully supported deregulation and the notion of trickle down economics. If we loosen the regulatory purse strings that government tightly controls, we will all prosper. The system works.

As a family, we were fortunate to have more than most, and we were Republican to the core. I was genetically Republican, the way that someone is genetically programmed to have brown hair or blue eyes — every cell in my body had been programmed with the GOP gene.

And I trusted that the political values that my family had instilled in me would serve me well. I believed in the system.

And then one of my children got sick. With a blood condition that no one could pronounce and a pediatric mandate requiring immediate enrollment at a children’s hospital. And I awoke.

Suddenly, everywhere I turned, there were sick children. Children with diabetes, children with cancer, children with obesity, children with asthma and children with allergies. What had happened?

As headlines in the paper warned me of environmental dangers, I began to pay attention. What was in the food? Wasn’t organics a left-leaning thing? And what about the plastics and the baby bottles and the vaccines? Should I worry? Doesn’t our system protect us from these dangers?

And without realizing it, an internal battle had silently begun.

I lay awake at night after conversations with my father, who dismissed my concerns and growing awareness of our system’s shortcomings. Had a generation of grandfathers failed to recognize the health risks associated with capitalism’s profits, unintentionally jeopardizing the well being of their grandchildren?

I had been raised to support the system, to believe in it, to never question it, and certainly to never speak out. Activism was something that “radicals” did, certainly not conservative, Republican soccer moms.

But I couldn’t shake the internal dialogue. Armed with an MBA in finance and my four children, I began to investigate the expanding role that corporations had taken in the system in which I was raised to believe. And I was stunned.

There were insecticidal toxins in crops to increase profitability for the world’s largest agrichemical corporation — a company whose former employees included Donald Rumsfeld and Clarence Thomas. There were petroleum-based chemicals in my children’s toys and shampoos that were a product of an oil corporation that had recruited me in business school. How had this happened? Had we forsaken our physical health for financial wealth?

As I struggled with the responsibility that I felt for betraying my own children, I realized that it was my responsibility to act. But the internal battle raged on — as the call from my conscience collided with the familiar comfort of conformity — and I was paralyzed.

But with sick children, paralysis was not an option.

I realized that I had to find the courage, on behalf of my children and others, to speak out against the very system in which my family believed.

And I reluctantly stepped forward.

With the words of another crusader in hand, I found my voice: “Each time a man stands up for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope, and crossing each other from a million different centers of energy and daring, those ripples build a current that can sweep down the mightiest walls” (Robert F. Kennedy).

It is with that hope, and holding the hands of my four children, that I took a stand.

It is our turn to engage, to help our fathers re-create the world that their grandchildren deserve. We must not be daunted by the enormity of the task at hand.

If we dare to dream that it is possible to affect this change for our children, we will be inspired by hope and find the courage and capacity to act. Together.

It is not too late. And “remember, during those times of doubt and frustration, that there is nothing naïve about your impulse to change the world.”

For the sake of our children, we have to.

VividLife.me Contributor

Robyn O’Brien

Technorati Tags: Conscience, Courage, Growth, Robyn O'Brien

Tags: Conscience, Courage, Growth, Robyn O'Brien

Appreciating the parent you are…

December 16, 2009 by vividlife
Filed under Parents, • Feature

2 Comments

I want to appreciate you, just for being the parent you are.

Will you join me?

Would you please take a moment…even a fraction of a
second…right now…and appreciate yourself as a parent?

Seriously.

How often do we take time–even a nanosecond–to appreciate not what we’re doing, but simply that we arebeing the grown-up in this little person or these little people’s lives?

Just the fact of our existence and presence means they get to have a sense of themselves in the world as someone important, someone loved, someone special.

We are that gift!

No matter what human frailties we have exhibited, what things we’ve said or done that weren’t as we wished…we are here. And they are right where they are because we brought them into our lives.

So I say to you today: Well done, parents!

And if we do want to take it a step further…

womanflowers

Let’s appreciate our inherently human qualities…those things that mean the world to little ones (even though they may not realize it).

The warmth of our hugs…

The shine in our eyes when we watch them…

The glow of our smile…

Just as we appreciate the young people in our lives, just for being them…let’s take a moment to appreciate ourselves–just for being us–and what an amazing impact we have–just by being ourselves–on the lives of the young ones we care for.

Thank you, all parents, from the bottom of my heart, for showing up in whatever ways you can. It means the world to your children.

I know I can forget to appreciate myself…when I do, like right now, I realize, Wow, I am, after all, enough. Maybe even more than enough. :-)

How do you feel when you take the time to appreciate yourself? Please tell me in the space below.

Warmly,

Jill

Source: http://www.awakeparent.com/jill/please-take-a-moment-today/#more-756

Technorati Tags: appreciation, awake parent, conscious parenting, gratitude, Growth, inspiration, Parents, personal development, self appreciation, vividlife

Tags: appreciation, awake parent, conscious parenting, gratitude, Growth, inspiration, Parents, personal development, self appreciation, vividlife

Natural Parenting: Going Back To Basics To Save Money

December 4, 2009 by vividlife
Filed under Parents, • Headline

3 Comments

Centuries before, large families were the norm. William Shakespeare was one of eight children. Benjamin Franklin was the tenth. Tennyson, the poet, was one of twelve. It took a lot of sacrifice and hard work to raise a large brood. Nowadays, even with less number of children (around two and three) as the average, parents are finding it difficult to cope with the accompanying expenses of providing for their needs, even if they take out easy personal loans to stretch the household budget. During these hard financial times, parents, particularly of small children, are going back to the basics and embracing natural parenting to save money and the planet.

What does “natural parenting” mean? It means a return to the ways of earlier generations of parents, as well as other cultures that have natural approaches. Think breastfeeding, cloth diapers, and making homemade baby food. These practical ways can really stretch a couple’s paycheck and would do the household budget good. For those who are worried about making their payday cash loan last in times of financial crisis, here are some important budget savers to try.

Breastfeeding is a common and completely natural parenting practice. It is known for its economic (no worries about the rising cost of baby formula), environmental (no lugging of bottles or worrying if these are made of non-toxic material), and developmental (it creates a bond between mums and babies) benefits. Breastfeeding, indeed, saves cash and, to top it off, reduces environmental waste. According to some recent research, it is estimated that parents can save over $1,000 in the first year of breastfeeding alone.

The next common and practical budget saver for parents taking care of newborn babies until they are toddlers is by using cloth diapers. Many grandparents remember using them many years back, without a thought of hassles and stress. There are many benefits to cloth diapers, not just for the checkbook and the environment, but more so for the babies. Babies in cloth diapers have less diaper rash and they tend to potty train earlier. Think about that kind of relief for parents! Studies show that cloth diapers can easily save parents and their tight budgets the amount of $800 to as high as $1,600 per child per year. Using these budget and eco savers would also help lessen the 10,000 tons of diapers dumped in landfills.

Another natural choice is to make homemade baby food by using a food processor to puree select produce. Homemade baby food is healthier than processed products, which usually contain starchy and sugary fillers. The cost savings is substantial. Depending on the items, it will save parents up to half a dollar per 2.5-ounce bottle. So, the next time that parents are worried how they can stretch their payday loans until the next fortnight, they should think of trying these tested natural parenting budget savers.