Household Chores – Benefits & Rewards

Combine career changes, complicated renovations to the house and sprinkle in a brother-in-law-turned-renter into the mix, and you have a recipe for chaos. My house was disorganized, and trying to get the family to organize it and keep it tidy was a losing battle.

Unable to come up with a solution to our problem, I turned to the well reviewed “Organizing from the Inside Out” by Julie Morgenstern for advice.

The audio book was a quick listen but powerful in its message. Morgenstern bases her organizational system on one all Kindergarten classroom use. In the classroom, every activity has its defined place and all objects related to that activity have to be stored in that area. Her system worked to get my house organized, but I need a way to maintain the organization and get people to complete the chores needed to accomplish this goal.  Consequently, I came up with an activity inspired by the power and simplicity of Morgenstern’s system.

Like motivating a grade school class, I needed to break through the diversity of the personalities doing the work by integrating teamwork, fairness in the distribution of the chores and make the activity fun and interactive.

Everyone was expected to participate because it was time to introduce my two year old to the responsibilities of household chores.

Therefore, I chose a time of the week where I knew everyone would be home, and too groggy to put up a fight. For us, that time was 10:00 am on Sunday morning.

To prepare for the activity I did the following:

1. For the adults, I divided the house work into different chores and wrote them on to folded pieces of paper and placed the slips into a bowl.
2. My son was assigned a separate set of chores that took into account his age and attention span. I also, wanted to give him chores that were fun, built his confidence and a sense of responsibility. The chores included …
   1. brushing the dog
   2. cleaning up toys
   3. using the hand vacuum
   4. coloring a picture for mommy
3. Toddler chores were marked with an orange marker so that they were easy to pick out of the bowl.
4. For extra incentive, slips that awarded prizes were mixed in with the chores. Prizes included …
   1. gift cards
   2. prizes in lieu of work
   3. certificates that allowed people to trade up  chores  with someone else
5. My son was given slips that allowed him to win …
   1. coloring books
   2. small toys
   3. candy

The slips of paper were mixed into a bowl. People drew out chores and prizes until the bowl was empty.

Then, the fun begins.

Every week, one person is responsible to run the game and pick the prizes.

It is hard to motivate a single person and at times impossible to motivate a group of people. Sometimes, going back to basics is the best plan of action.

Set a simple goal that benefits everyone involved, find a time that does not inconvenience the group and make the process fun and interactive. The results can create a foundation where larger and more complicated goals can be achieved in the future.

If anyone else has any activities they use to get their family motivated, please tell us in the comments.

Technorati Tags: creating a chore list, getting kids to do chores, helping with chores, housework, kids and chores, motivating to do housework, Motivation, organizing

What we can learn from Charlie Sheen: The Positive Adjustment

If you were like me, at some point in your life your parents told you that you needed an attitude adjustment.  Usually this is a response to behavior that is not acceptable to the family or society.

Most people learn from their mistakes and go on to be positive, productive, people in society, but then there are people like Charlie Sheen.

This article deals with the positive adjustments he can make to turn his life around and dispel his demons.

Be a positive and responsible father.

Currently Charlie is living the definition that anyone can make a child but not everyone can raise a one.

A father with four kids does not have the time or energy to party hard and develop bad habits.  After a day at the park, giving baths, reading bedtime stories and doing  the other million things that go into spending time with your children, he would be too wiped out to do anything but sleep.

With four young kids it is time for Charlie to become an active participating father figure.

Having a conscious approach to finances.

We admit Charlie really does have the advantage here.  Financially he makes more than the average father and can enjoy a lot of luxuries in life.

He needs to have his money put into a trust that gives him a monthly stipend to live off of.  The trust would ensure that the kids are taken care of, the monthly bills are paid, and Charlie never has to fear bankruptcy.

Maybe, Charlie can find ways to entertain the kids without spending money as many families have to do in this economy.

Charlie will begin to learn to live within his abundance and not abuse it.

Make donations to help society.

The trustee should be allowed to take the money that Charlie use to spend on drugs and alcohol and donate it to worthy causes.

A great idea is to give money to habitat for humanity to build much needed low income homes.  This way, underprivileged families can get out of the drug infested areas that Charlie now supports through his illicit drug use.

Charlie begins to spend his funds to serve a greater positive purpose.

Donate time and volunteer to help others.

Charlie should start spending his time helping out at homeless shelters, food banks, and community kitchens.

This experience would give him face to face interaction with people who are down on their luck and losing a battle with drugs and alcohol.

This may open his eyes to individuals or families that struggle every day and cannot afford the basic necessities of life.

He can use his time to relate and understand his actions by viewing them through others.

As a sought out entertainer, Charlie Sheen has a lot going for him.  Unfortunately in the family and real life departments he seems to be oblivious.

We are pulling for you Charlie, we really are.

Please get clean, get adjusted and continue to entertain us for years to come as your talent is a true blessing.

Technorati Tags: alcoholism, attitude, Charlie Sheen, drug addiction, parenting, Two and a half men

Lifestyle Changes: Self Reflection

People can mistakenly feel that it is up to others to fix our shortcomings. Without some form of intervention, many people are happy to pretend problems do not exist, and when no one comes running to the rescue they welcome hitting rock bottom.

Once presented with the hard truth, people decline the help because they lack the motivation to go through with it or are turned off because they had no hand in formulating the solutions.

Many times they are insulted by the accusation because it challenges their version of reality. People like easy fixes, but in nature there is no free lunch. People want a quick reward for their work and have a hard time seeing the big picture and the ultimate result of their effort. Other times, the guilt of what they have done stunts the desire to move forward and emotionally drains a person.

Before it ever gets to this point, we can sit down and give ourselves the time to reflect on our life and our actions. Challenge your reality with a set of questions that gets you to the facts, unclouded by your vanity.

Here are some tips to get you on your way to rewarding self-reflection:

• Be prepared to write down stuff.
  • Most importantly make time for yourself. People readily give their time to others, with little regard for their own interests.

• Maintain your mental fitness.
  • The same way you need physical exercise to maintain the strength and durability of your body, your brain needs exercises to maintain mental health, happiness, and mindfulness.

• Get your friends and family to help you.
  • Explain to people how important it is for you to work out your thoughts and reflect on your life.
  • Explain to them how this will benefit everyone involved.

• Dedicate yourself to a schedule.
  • Consistency is the best way to create a new habit, so a daily writing session is the best scenario.
  • Schedule your writing session so that it fits your lifestyle. Some suggestions include early in the morning, lunch at work, or before you go to sleep.

• Keys to developing a good writing habit, is finding the immediate reward in the act.
  • Early or late writing sessions can clear your mind.
  • You can start in the morning by removing any doubts you may have about the day ahead of you and organize your thoughts on the tasks you have to complete.

• Remove yourself from the confusion, stress, and negativity of everyday life.
  • Calm your mind by listening to music or meditate.
  • Find a personal space away from distraction

• Use questions to guide your thoughts and reasoning.
  • Create a worksheet to ask yourself relevant questions that allow you to reflect on your situation, actions and emotions.

• Short on time or emotionally charged? Write anyways.
  • Writing without a plan of what you want to achieve is still beneficial.
  • It records your feelings, recollections, and interactions and creates a reference for future reflections.
  • Be aware that these sessions can be clouded by unmitigated positive and negative emotions.

• Review
  • Take the time to review what you have written.
  • Lessons are forgotten, good intentions lose their inspiration and time creates complacency.
  • Make note of reoccurring themes and issues. These are the core problems that you will tackle with deeper introspection and the help of a friend or better yet a professional

• Try to dedicate one single notebook for your writing.
  • If your writing is sporadic and spur of the moment, create a folder to keep all your writing together.
  • It is hard to review your writing if you cannot find it.
  • Always date your work.

• Know when it is ok to throwaway old entries.
  • Self-reflection is counter intuitive if you review traumatic events or if the entries represent behaviour you have changed.
  • Without proper reference, your writing can distort recollections of the past.
  • Ongoing sessions will inevitably have you writing about more positive reflections, and you will gain strength from your accomplishments.

Adaptability is our greatest skill and all people are capable of change. Yet, it is irresponsible and dangerous to rely on others to force positive change on us.

The simple act of honest and sincere writing can be the key to an emotional awakening and personal contentment.

The next article will look at different technologies and techniques to help you in your journey of self reflection.

By: Philip Viana & Kenneth Lane

Technorati Tags: clearing bad energy, expressing emotions, expression on paper, journal writing, journaling, keeping a journal, write a journal, writing your feelings

Positive Lifestyle Changes : Food

My family has fallen into a dietary rut. We try our best to cook nutritious meals at home; but lately we are eating more and more processed meals and ordering fast food. We buy vegetables and fruits, but much of the time they go to waste. It is a cycle I have experienced before and promised myself to avoid.

I was overweight in my 20′s, I ate too much sugar, not enough vegetables, no whole grains and everything I ingested was processed. I did not want to pass on these lifestyle traits to my son.

With this in mind, my family is trying to institute some lifestyle changes to promote healthier eating.

1. Create a fixed food budget, and keep it on the low side.

Pay extra for quality ingredients and avoid the cheaper processed meals.

High budget shopping usually ends up with large amounts of groceries that are unhealthy and never get used. Pre-cooked foods and processed meals are convenient, unhealthy, and expensive.

2. Shop for groceries more often, but with less products on your list.

North American schedules have dictated that we shop 2 to 4 times a month for groceries. We buy in bulk, not buying for what we are going to cook, but what we might cook.

Start small and make time for more frequent trips to the super market. Shop with a purpose; make sure you have only enough products that you can sneak through the 12 items or less line.

You’ll be motivated and inspired to cook if you have just bought food with a recipe in mind. Ultimately, you’ll cook with fresher produce and meats, which will produce better meals.

3. Make your list at home and stick by it.

Be prepared to walk into the grocery store and know exacty what you are buying and what isle you will find it in.

Store specials are flashy and tempting, but they are also distracting you from a lifestyle change. In a split second, that frozen pizza on sale is much more appealing than the salad you were set on making that night.

4. Make a list of 10 recipes that you can rotate.

Less recipes, make cooking times more efficient and reduces waste. This allows you to build a staple of groceries and reduces shopping times.

Changing the set of recipes you use for different seasons can also be effective in maximizing the freshness of the food and reducing the cost.

5. Order groceries online.

Shopping online will free up your time and keep children from influencing your purchases. How many of us have had children place a bag of cookies or chips in the buggy as you wander the isles?

People looking for high quality produce might be appalled about ordering produce without being able to inspect it for ripeness, but there has to be a certain amount of trust in the online grocer and their dedication of quality.

6. Get your kids involved.

Finding time to spend with your children is hard. Teaching them to cook and prepare meals gives you precious face time with your kids. The benefit for them will be unending as they will have the skills to feed themselves properly when they are out on their own.

By their pre-teens, they can take up some of the responsibilities for making meals and free up your time.

7. Eat at a table with the television off.

A good home cook meal should be enjoyed and intermixed with lively discussions of the happenings of the day. Even in silence the meal seperates people from the stress of the day.

Slowing down to eat together also impacts the food you cook . A meal eaten slowly is a meal enjoyed. Even if the family doesn’t always talk, eating a meal together is a bonding experience.

8. Use the microwave for cooking and not just heating up food.

The microwave was created for convenience, and companies took full advantage of this. Creating readymade foods that could heat up in a fraction of the time it would take in a conventional oven.

But, if you look online, you will find many recipes that use the microwave to cook good meals.You will save time and energy, and as a bonus it allows younger children to cook without the danger of using a stove or oven.

9. Get rid of the sugar.

Make drinking pop a prize, as it is literally a desert.

Clear out the fruit juices unless its freshly squeezed and bring in the milk and water. If you start kids early enough, they can learn to enjoying drinking liquids without sugar.

10. Make fruit a desert.

Avoid the whip cream and the extra sugar. Sell your family on the idea of fresh fruit as part of your meal.

11. Create 25 fast food tokens for the year.

Every time you order fast food or eat out, take out a token.

Once they are gone, they are gone; it will take discipline, but will be worth it. You’ll be teaching your kids that fast food is a treat no different than candy and that portioned out over time in a responsible matter it tastes that much better.

I hope that tips inspires people to find their own way to cook delicious and healthy meals while making time for things that are important for them.

Technorati Tags: food shopping tips, Healthy Eating, healthy eating tips, healthy meal planning, healthy meals, plan a healthy meal, tips for healthy eating

Laughing your way to Happiness

Many self-help gurus will tell you that success has many meanings but I argue it only has one true meaning and that is happiness.

Laughing your way to happiness affects all parts of your life. What is the point of being wealthy, rich, and even healthy if you are not happy? Let us look at some of the benefits of laughing and being happy.

Laughter has many positive effects on the human body. It helps take in more oxygen, which allows the cells in the body to pass more waste out of the system. It also aids in keeping stress down. At the Swedish Cancer Hospital in Chicago “Laughter Yoga” is being used regularly during chemotherapy sessions to help patients and caregivers cope with pain and trauma.

Cancer Treatment Centers of America points out that laughter has been used since the early 13th century by doctors to distract patients from pain. Using laughter therapy in conjunction with regular cancer resulted in these benefits for patients.

• Boosts the immune system and circulatory system
• Relaxes muscles throughout the body
• Balance blood pressure
• Relieve pain
• Improves mental function

It has proven so beneficial that laughing has been tested and accepted by the Cancer Treatment Centers of America for use within their programs alongside chemotherapy.

Some companies have now introduced laughter yoga programs to their business environment. Laughter Yoga is a business that has 6000 clubs in over 60 countries. One case study yielded the following results:

• Sales increased by 25% over one year
• Stress levels decreased by 75% over one year
• Increase in loyalty due to the positive work environment

These results stress what laughter can bring to the work environment. They find that when workers have laughter in their environment they take their work more seriously but themselves more lightly making work a better place to be.

Laughing Yoga has also had a great effect for individuals dealing with physical and mental challenges. Physically challenged children have revealed a marked improvement in their motor and expressive skills. As individuals begin to have a decline in their mental faculties, they have a hard time comprehending humour. Laughing Yoga gives them the opportunity to receive the health benefits of laughter.

Businesses have found that laughter can directly affect their bottom line. It is so successful that Laughter Yoda has 6000 clubs in over 60 countries that reach out to individuals and businesses.

When you add in the mental benefits of Laughter Yoga it becomes a great fitness therapy without all the physical stress of a gym. Researchers have even found that 15-20 minutes of laughter can burn enough calories per year to lose 4.4 pounds.

When you put yourself in a position of laughter you become naturally happy. Going forward when life or work seems to have you down, just have yourself a great belly laugh.

Technorati Tags: Funny, Personal Growth, Philip Viana, self help, self-help gurus

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