Saturday, February 4, 2012

READ: An Excerpt from: ‘The Guru and the Jerk’ by Christopher Pinckley

My latest work is called ‘The Guru and the Jerk’ and is the first of a new, emotionally honest trilogy

I recently completed the final edit for The Guru and the Jerk.   I had previously released this book only to find that I had neglected quite a few grammatical errors.  My hope had been to release this book as raw as I possibly could, but this approach backfired on me as it needed editing.  So, now it’s done!  The book will be available as a kindle ebook at first, and then later as a paperback.

In this work I bring a ‘no holds barred’ approach to spirituality and self help which I feel has been missing for way too long.  There is just too much misinformation and conflicting opinions and beliefs out there to let this go on any longer.  People are becoming scared of what they think and feel for fear that they are going to create a catastrophe for themselves.  A lot of people are trying to make spiritual bypasses and delve into the spiritual realms hoping that they can create heaven on Earth.  While that’s not a completely bad idea in itself, it does not lend to creating the life of your dreams if you are repressing your emotional states of being during the process.

Thus, The Guru and the Jerk is all about emotional honesty and a hard, behind the scenes look at the making of a spiritual teacher and self help author.

I hope you enjoy the honesty, the frankness, and the realism that I provide while describing my personal journey behind the scenes.

Chapter 8 Spiritual Sexuality

So, what is the difference between me and another guy sitting at Starbucks who is checking out the ladies? Why would I attempt to elevate myself beyond the status of just some dude ogling women at the Starbucks, you might ask?

Well, a couple of things separate me from this idiot.

First, I am emotionally honest about it. In other words, I will openly admit it to anyone who asks me. This, in itself, exemplifies an alternate state of consciousness. In other words, I am not trying to cover it up by either repressing it within myself or lying to someone else about it.

For example, there was a guy sharing my table the other day at the Starbucks in Walnut Creek. A beautiful Italian woman came in who had an extremely athletic build which I found fascinating. I admired the way she had crafted her body through exercise. Every woman is beautiful to me and wears her beauty in her own way. This woman had refined her body in an athletic kind of way. This guy sharing my table was pretending to be busy, doing some sort of work, but he was watching her too. So I said: “She has a nice athletic body, eh?” And, can you guess what his reply was? A slightly embarrassed grunt “umgh” as if he wasn’t really looking at her and who am I to even bring it up!? In other words, total unconsciousness. A person who is this unconscious might be the very person who cheats on his wife. He pretends that he isn’t staring at every single woman around him, but he is busy doing exactly that.

You do not have to worry about the people who put it out there. Emotionally honest people, even if they are rude, are in the light. Let me say that again: Emotionally honest people are in the light. Whereas, emotionally dishonest people (deeply unconscious people), are in the dark. Do you understand the powerful difference here?

One guy might say that he is checking out the chicks at Starbucks. Another guy might say that he would never do anything like that, but he is busy cheating on his wife with a woman he met at Starbucks.

This also applies to women. I’ve dated women who adamantly deny that they crave external validation only to find that they are secretly making eye contact with every single dude that walks by. When confronted with this they are in total denial.

Why?

Because anything that deeply unconscious cannot be admitted as a conscious act.

You might as well ask a gerbil why they are looking at somebody, as ask an unconscious girlfriend or boyfriend that question. The only difference is that the gerbil won’t become angry with you. We could also look at why it bothers you that your partner is looking at somebody or why you notice it or why you feel the need to confront that. This is sort of beside the point I am trying to make right now though.

Here is another way of speaking about emotional honesty: If you run into someone in New York City who doesn’t like you, guess what? They will tell say it to your face – and not in a nice way.

By contrast, if you run into someone in Los Angeles who doesn’t like you, guess what? They will smile at your face and shake your hand. But, you will leave that interaction with an ungood feeling.

Why?

Because anyone, even unconscious people, sense that something is just not right. That person who doesn’t like you gave you a cold prickly instead of a warm fuzzy.

Think of it this way: Would you rather have a cold prickly on the outside of you, where you can see it, and not take it too personally? Or, would you rather have a cold prickly somewhere inside of you, and not understand where this yucky feeling is coming from?

Are you starting to get the picture now?

Of course, you can take this to the extreme too, especially a lot of men whom I have observed. “Hey man, I love women, what can I say?” That phrase has been uttered by more than one man who rationalizes that he is emotionally honest as a way to basically try to sleep with as many women as he can. Now we have a dude who is basically unconscious and additionally manipulative. Big fun for women.

I consider myself to be a sexual being. But, what does that mean? By saying that, am I creating an excuse so that I can live my life in a certain way? I think it is new and important for us to address our assumptions about ourselves. More people are beginning to recognize core aspects of themselves, whether they use numerology, integral theory, or transpersonal psychology. Along with them, I am trying to become more aware of various aspects of myself; I am trying to categorize the various aspects of my ‘self’, as it were.

This powerful tool might help me understand myself, but could it become a handicap?

Consider this categorization: “I am a Type A personality.”

This is an example of a gross overgeneralization that permeates our modern day culture. So, you’re telling me that there are two types of personalities: Type A and Type B? That’s it? “Oh yeah, I’m a Type A for sure man.”

This is obviously ridiculous and cannot even remotely encompass the human experience. However, now we have spiritual people doing it with all manner of different types of personality charts. Ok, so in the beginning I would be inclined to agree that this can offer valuable insight into one’s own psyche in that you can potentially become aware of who you are and why you do what you do.

Got it.

But, what if I denote that I am a ‘sexual being’, so to speak? Do I then get to rationalize my behavior by going around sleeping with as many women as I can? Because let me tell you, I can. I could say, “Well, I am a very sexual being and being sexually intimate with women is something that my Soul yearns for. I feel energized and excited by being with different women. I truly love women and love being with them.”

Will you buy that for a dollar?

You can apply the ‘I am an xyz type of personality/soul’ to any scenario to rationalize and perpetuate any behavior. So, it can get messy. So it becomes important to understand the real meaning of ‘Integration.’

Christopher Pinckley is the author of Reality Creation 101, a ground breaking spiritual self-help book about healing your unconscious and learning how to become the conscious creator of your own experience. He is also a spiritual teacher, blogger, and life coach. Look for his break through coaching program at the start of 2011. http://www.realitycreation101.com/

 

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In the Pursuit of Consciousness: Relating to relationships

Here is an interesting question: Who are you within the parameters of an intimate relationship?  Do you understand this question?  I’m not always as clear as I would like to be, so I want to make sure that everyone is on the same page here.  The question speaks not necessarily to whom you are now, but who you will become when you engage in an emotionally dynamic relationship with an intimate, relational partner.  In other words, if you are like most people, then you will begin to transform and morph your behavior once you enter into ‘the relationship’.,…

It’s Not About the Actions But About the Energy Behind those Actions by Hemal Radia

It’s not about the actions that you take but the energy (vibration) behind those actions. It’s not about what you do, but your thoughts and congruency and alignment about what you do. You can take less actions and get great results, or you can take all the actions in the world and it not quite be how you want it. The factor is the thoughts about (and behind) your actions.,…

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READ: In the Pursuit of Consciousness: Relating to relationships

The Ultimate Challenge

Here is an interesting question: Who are you within the parameters of an intimate relationship?  Do you understand this question?  I’m not always as clear as I would like to be, so I want to make sure that everyone is on the same page here.  The question speaks not necessarily to whom you are now, but who you will become when you engage in an emotionally dynamic relationship with an intimate, relational partner.  In other words, if you are like most people, then you will begin to transform and morph your behavior once you enter into ‘the relationship’.

Have you noticed it?

More and more single people around these days, right?  Some might say more and more lonely people.  However it is my belief that there are more and more courageous people these days who dare to become emotionally independent, and who dare to dream of self actualization.  Sure, you might argue that self actualization is something that could or perhaps, should, be able to be pursued no matter what your relational status is.  However, I argue that for most people this is a state of being that must be pursued in relative emotional isolation.  Most people who say otherwise are most likely fooling themselves.  Conversely, you could argue that self actualization can not happen without a significant other to be your ‘mirror’ and show you yourself, fully as it were.

Gaiam Subscription Clubs

There are exceptions to this however, a few here, a few there.  Some folks can actualize themselves and tackle the responsibilities of being a conscious partner at the same time.  However, these individuals are few and far between.  Most people are constantly in an unconscious state of seeking love and validation and thus, the person or people who choose to be single, are often in recognition of the emotionally addictive nature of relationships and are in the process of trying to wean themselves off of this drug.

I can hear you out there

Proponents of the argument for a loving relationship are very vocal when it comes to this philosophy.  They say, ‘But you need to love and be loved to be whole’ or ‘it’s my right to want someone to love’ or ‘you cannot evolve without someone to show you who you are.’  I’ve heard it all, truly.  Everyone has their own individual path to enlightenment and will take that path.  No two paths will ever look the same, but I will tell you this: most people are more likely to undergo conscious evolution outside of a relationship than inside of one.  You can argue all you want with me, but that is the truth.  Most of the fully illumined conscious seekers have taken some years outside of and away from the confines of ‘the relationship’ in order to actualize themselves to the point where they feel emotionally independent and evolved.

Here is the question

What happens if, you find someone, but you are still in the process of evolving and working on yourself?  What happens if you are a conscious seeker who is working to integrate your emotional body (arguably the only aspect that really needs to be integrated) and then this other person pops up in your life?  What if they are also a conscious seeking, spiritual being like yourself?  How do you negotiate this new terrain?

Maintaining consciousness

In the pursuit of consciousness one finds that the trick is not really pursuing it, but rather maintaining it.  Thus, the pursuit of consciousness becomes the maintenance of consciousness from moment to moment.  As a very good friend of mine says, “How about now?” and “How about now?”  If you understand what this means then you understand that my meaning is that the pursuit of consciousness is being with how you feel in every moment.  How do you feel in this moment?  If you are able to be emotionally honest and in touch with how you feel then you may notice, of a sudden, that in this particular moment you are feeling less than integrated; then you can allow this feeling to surface for integration.  This is the ultimate pursuit of consciousness.

So now, engaging in this type of interaction with a significant other?  With someone who will become your mirror and most likely trigger you in big and small ways?  The maintenance of consciousness has never been so challenged as in the arena of intimacy.  Here is the testing and proving ground of any would be conscious seeker and experienced integrationist.  Here is where you will get to find out how conscious you really are.  Are you willing to allow to come up, be with, and ultimately integrate whatever feeling comes your way?  This is the test that many are stepping up to the plate during these extreme times to come face to face with.  This is your test, this is your challenge.  Be who you want to be with by integrating your mirror.

 

Christopher Pinckley

Author of Reality Creation 101

Reality Creation 101

On kindle

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READ: Conversations with a Guru: One job to do

So I asked him, “Oh guru, what is the difference between ‘personality’ and ‘ego’?”

He replied, “None.”

I then asked him, “Well then, if I completely diminish my ego, who will I become?”

His response was, “Why would you want to do that?”

“But, oh guru, is not our duty to extinguish or diminish our own egos to the best of our ability during an incarnation?”

“My son, your duty is to be love, nothing more, nothing less.  Everything else is just a pretend game; you are pretending not to be love, that which you are.  Run, play, create, have fun, and be love!  You do not need to diminish any part of yourself in order to do this; you only need to have the courage to be who you truly are.”

“But guru, surely we are supposed to be doing something?  Surely we have duties and obligations to our fellow man?”

The guru looked me in the eye and said, “Indeed, my son, you do.  I will repeat your duty, your only duty; be love.  You do not need to give someone money, or clothing, or shelter, in order for you to be love.  You only need to wake up in the morning and smile and be glad.  That is your only duty my son.  All else is illusion.”

I was in total disbelief, shock, and denial.  I stuttered, “But guru, oh guru, there is so much suffering in the world?  Is it not our job to end suffering?”

“You can never end another’s suffering my son, nor is that your job.  You cannot tell another what to do, you cannot coerce another to do it, and you cannot convince another to do it.  Their suffering is not your business.  You only have one business, to be love.  End your own suffering and you shall have planted the seed to end their suffering.  In doing this you will have made the biggest contribution to end the suffering of the earth.”

“But, guru, I am not suffering.  I only suffer when I think of other’s suffering.  This is not my own suffering, I do not suffer.”

The guru shook his head thoughtfully, “My son, if you have no suffering within you, then you will never suffer.  Another way of saying this is that when you are love, no one elses suffering will cause you to suffer.  Another way to say this is that you are not being love and when you are not being love you are in a continual state of suffering.  If another person’s suffering causes you suffering it is simply because they are making you aware that you are not being love.  No one else can create your suffering; they can only show you that you have suffering within you, which is another way of saying that you are not being love.”

“So, if I see that someone else is suffering then that means that I am suffering…?”

“If it causes you to suffer, then you are simply seeing your own wounded, suffering self within them.  And of course it also means that you are not being love.  If, in that moment, you were able to be love, you would see their suffering diminish and eventually dissolve, right before your eyes.”

“I see.  But, oh guru, I have another question?  What if I want to have a really nice car and a really big house?”

“What if you do?”

“Should I strive to get these things?  Or, am I being egotistical and self centered in my desires?”

“Do these things bring you joy?”

“Well, yes, they do!”

“Then you should have them.”

“But, is it not greedy for me to want them when there are others in the world who do not have enough food and water and shelter?”

“Can you end their suffering?”

“Well, maybe if I used the money that I make to send food and supplies instead of get my house and fancy car, I can make a contribution.”

“Would that make you happy?”

“Well, I would feel better knowing that.”

“Would you?”

“Well, I wouldn’t feel so guilty at least.”

“So, you would give up the things that bring you joy out of your guilt then?”

“Uh, yes I guess I would.”

“Would this end the suffering of the world?”

“Well, if everyone did this then it might end all the suffering.”

“So, my son, you are saying that if everyone gave up the things that brought them joy it would end all the suffering of the world?”

“Well, no, I didn’t mean it that way.  I meant that if everyone made sacrifices that the world could be a better place, maybe.”

“What kind of sacrifices would be enough to end all suffering?”

“The kind that got enough money and resources to the people who needed them, of course.”

“Really?  And how has this worked out in the past when it was tried?”

“I do not understand oh guru, can you explain it to me?”

“My son, what happens to a person or a people when you begin to supply things for them which they have not been able to provide for themselves?”

“You are implying that this is a bad thing?”

“I imply nothing my son; I simply ask you what happens to people when you supply them with things that they are unable to supply themselves with?”

“Well, I think that they begin to feel loved and cared for.”

“Do they?  Or, do they begin to seek the love and care that they need from an outside source instead of realizing that they have everything they need within themselves?”

“Well, I don’t think it’s either/or oh guru.  I think this is a both/and.”

“My son everything in the Universe is made of consciousness, yes?”

“Yes, oh guru.”

“So then, is there an end to consciousness?”

“Well, of course not oh guru, there is no end to that which has no limit.  This was your first teaching to me and I knew it to be true when you first spoke it.”

“So then, if everything in the Universe is consciousness, and consciousness is limitless, then who decides who gets more consciousness and who gets less?”

“Well, I do not understand guru.  What does this have to do with clothing and shelter?”

“My son, clothing and shelter are simply manifestations of consciousness.  But, more importantly, they are manifestations of specific types of consciousness which are unique to each individual soul incarnating on the earth.  Each soul will manifest their life in whatever way they choose.  And, it all centers around one thing, one undeniable concept.  That, my son, is love.  How much love will you allow yourself to be?”

“Wait a second oh guru, are you telling me that people who have no food, clothing, or shelter are not allowing themselves to be love?”

“My son, I am saying exactly that.”

“But, oh guru, is it still not our job to show our love by giving to those who are in need?”

“My son, only if it brings you immense joy to do so.  In other words, if you are being love, then all action that you take is divine right action.  However, if you are being less than love, then you are still living an illusion.  It all comes back to that my boy.  Be love, let the world figure itself out, this is not your job.”

 

Christopher A. Pinckley

Author of Reality Creation 101

www.realitycreation101.com

 

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READ: The Hidden Power of Belief

Your Beliefs Create Your Reality

The first thing that we know about ‘beliefs’ is that you create your reality within the parameter of the beliefs that you hold within your own consciousness.  This is a fancy way of saying that all of the beliefs that you hold, mostly unconsciously, create a window through which you create a constrained and limited version of yourself.  Some people may argue that they are creating exactly what they want with no limitation, but this is usually the minority and many of these individuals simply do not like to be told that they have limiting beliefs.  The truth is that everyone does.  The power is in becoming aware of this fact.

Here is the trick; every single belief is ultimately a limitation in your consciousness.  That’s right, a limitation.  A belief is formed to help you cope with reality as it is, not reality as you want it to be.  In other words you create, take on, or accept beliefs because you are (at the time) unable to create your own reality exactly the way you want it to be.

For instance, you may have dreams of running a business, being an actor, flying an airplane, or being an entrepreneur.  However, unconsciously within you is instilled the belief that you need to get a college degree in order to become anyone of worth.  So, either one of two things happen.  Either a) You go get the degree only to find out that it doesn’t necessarily mean that your life goes exactly the way you want it to (because you encounter other beliefs along the way) or b) You don’t get the college degree and subsequently sabotage yourself via the fact that your worth is subconsciously associated with whether you do have a college degree or not.  Now, you have one unconscious strike against you that is registered in your subconscious mind saying, “I am less worthy and less likely to succeed because I do not have a college degree.”

Knowing who you are

Most of us just aren’t born knowing who we are and what we want to do in life.  What happens to people along the way, especially for those of us who aren’t born knowing what we want to do, is that we begin to absorb more and more beliefs into our psyche.  We read studies, watch documentaries, and read books that portray limited versions of ourselves.  We continue to absorb all of this disinformation into our psyche until we get to the point where we firmly believe that life is a certain way.  Eventually it gets to the point where we are looking to outside sources to tell us who we are.

At this point, we no longer know who we are.  Instead of the childlike innocence of creative imagination, we have a strict, limited version of how our reality is supposed to be.  Worse, now we rely upon the very sources of disinformation that put us here to continue to guide us through our now, very limited reality.

Every time you rely upon a ‘study’ to tell you who you are you are in the process of giving away your personal power.  I’ll tell you right now that no one and I mean NO ONE who ever became famous or incredibly rich did so by conforming to the mass consensus beliefs on the subject.  In fact, most of these people are those who made their own rules and lived outside of the box, way outside the box.

When you begin to realize the power of who you are and that you hold to create your own life then you will begin to see the futility in prescribing to mass consciousness beliefs.  All mass consciousness beliefs are constrictive and limiting.

Pay attention to that which you wish to become

In life we are constantly bombarded via the media with massive amounts of limiting ideas and beliefs.  Big pharmaceutical companies pay for massive amounts of advertising to insert fear based beliefs about made up diseases into the consciousness of the people of the planet.  Big oil companies pay hundreds of millions of dollars to insert belief systems about different companies and types of gas that are better for the environment.  Fast food companies pay out massive sums of money to insert the belief that certain types of food are supposed to be a cultural way of life.

How many beliefs are really yours?

Have you ever wondered that?  How many beliefs that you have in your consciousness did you actually consciously choose to accept as your belief?  Probably around 1% of them; the other 99% were inserted subconsciously.  I’m sorry to have to say that to you, but it is most likely more true than anyone knows.

Sow what do we do?

Pay attention to what you are paying attention to.  That’s a good first step.  In other words, do you automatically turn on the TV when you get home?  If so then you are probably being programmed to a certain degree.  However, if you turn on the television with a specific show in mind, then you are less likely to be programmed.  Any television viewing has limited, subconscious programming involved.  However, the more conscious your choice is in what you watch and why, the less likely chance you will have of being subconsciously programmed.

If you are a regular purchaser of fast foods then it is quite possible that you are doing so because you have been programmed to. I’m not judging you for the fact as we have all been subjected to massive amounts of programming that are designed to create unconscious beliefs within our subconscious.  Rather, I’m saying that it is time to take back your mind.  Part of the taking back is waking up to what you are doing and why you are doing it.

Meditation

For those of you who know me know what my number one cure for just about everything is, especially limiting beliefs.  Meditation has been a tried and true technique for thousands of years in its ability to help you take back the power of your own mind.  Meditation, done consistently, can help you to get to the root of your limiting beliefs deep within your subconscious mind.  From consistent meditation you will be able to, slowly but surely, unravel the layers of beliefs, ideas, and emotional patterning that has been serving to keep you rooted in the same reality over and over again.

Meditation has the ability to begin to deconstruct the limited version of reality that you have been projecting out upon the world and thus living.  With consistent meditation you will begin to notice that, over time, your reality almost appears to physically deconstruct itself, resulting in something new that you have never experienced before.  But, it takes time and the commitment to change, the commitment to become a conscious creator.  That time is yours to spend however you want to, but I ask you to consider who’s mind your mind belongs to…

Christopher A. Pinckley

Author of Reality Creation 101

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Judgment: The Invisible Prison

Most people think that they are not nearly as judgmental as they truly are.  Yet, my finding is that we all hold onto some form of judgment, at an unconscious level and that we find ways to rationalize having this judgment on a daily basis.

Yet, I can guarantee you that:

If you judge rich people to be bad, then you will never be able to obtain that much money in your own life.

If you judge politicians to be corrupt, then you will never allow yourself to have enough power to wield the kind of influence that can create big changes in the world.

If you judge certain types of music, film, or media to be bad, then you will never fully allow yourself to be able to make a living using your own creative talents.

Think about it for a minute, are you sure that you are not holding onto some form of judgment about some people, or ways in which some people make their living?  I’ve never personally met anyone who didn’t have some form of judgment or another, either running consciously or unconsciously.

However, that’s the crux of it.  Most of our judgments run within our psyches at an unconscious level within our subconscious mind.  And even when we suddenly become aware of our judgment we quickly rationalize it through our unconscious beliefs that manifest as our personal life experience.

For example, you may have become aware of the fact that you are holding onto judgment about politicians and government.  However, you quickly come up with a reason to hold onto it such as: politicians have too much power.  Or, politicians are all out for themselves.  Or, politics are corrupt.

This is an example of how you can become conscious of your judgment but then immediately have an unconscious reaction that keeps in you in a place of judgment.  Perhaps even now some of you are saying, ‘Yes but, many politicians ARE corrupt!’  Perhaps that is true, but you being in judgment of politicians or politics will only serve to hinder your only ability to express your own power and influence.  That is unless you are running for office because you would like to make a change in the political structure of our current government and thus be the change that you are hoping for.  However, most people who are holding onto this type of judgment are not politicians, or planning on becoming politicians, or currently promoting a politician.  Thus, the only thing they really end up doing is keeping themselves from wielding any kind of influential power.

There is a difference

There is a difference between holding onto judgment about something and not supporting something by not participating in it.  In other words, by judging something you are simply holding yourself in a negative limiting thought pattern which will create a limited reality for you, in turn.  Whereas, if you simply decide that you do not enjoy something, you can take your attention away from it without any emotional charge.  In this way you are not creating a negative emotional charge for yourself and simultaneously continuing to allow your energy to flow freely to those things that you do desire to experience in life.

I dare you to do this

Here is an exercise that I enjoy doing occasionally and that I always find is illuminating within my own consciousness.  To eliminate some of the invisible bars within your invisible prison, begin by taking out a piece of paper and writing down a list of all the things in this world that you wish were different.  I mean, are you ready to challenge yourself here?  Most people chicken out on this because they desire to protect their limiting beliefs.  How about you?

1) Take out a piece of paper and a pen (not a pencil).

2) Now, write down every single thing that you either know that you have a judgment about or that you think is a ‘bad thing’ (Be sure to only write on the left hand side and leave space to write something next to each one on the right).

3) Now, I want you to go back on your list (should be at LEAST a full page or more) and write something next to it: the words ‘is good’ or ‘is great’ (your choice here).

4) At the end of this exercise you will have the words ‘is good’ or ‘is great’ by every single item on your list.  Ex: George Bush is good. Gangster rap is good. Lamborghini Diablo’s are great!
Do not be surprised to find that, within the next couple of days, you either have an integral dream (fragmented aspects of the psyche are assimilated through imagery within your super conscious state while dreaming) or a good feeling about life in general.  You will be further amazed to find that after doing this exercise you will find that you are more effective at creating the change, both in your life and the lives of others, that you have been hoping for all along.

 

Christopher A. Pinckley

Author of Reality Creation 101

www.christopherpinckley.com

www.realitycreation101.com

 

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