I was half-way through writing a blog about dealing mindfully with anger, and how it’s important to keep perspective and compassion at the front of our minds, when I got a phone call that put everything in perspective. Isn’t the Universe clever?
It reminded me of Dr Grant talking about the velociraptors in Jurassic Park,
‘And that’s when the attack comes. Not from the front, but from the side.’
A little levity is a good way to regain perspective in these situations, don’t you find?
I had been writing about how anger is a very real and unpleasant sensation. About how we’ve all been there and how we usually have very clear views about who is to blame.
Sometimes our anger is small and easy to deal with but sometimes there are more ‘hooks’ as Pema Chödrön calls them. This stronger anger gets it’s claws into us and sets of a chain reaction ingrained over years of practice.
How about this for a hook? The protectiveness you feel for your child or loved one? The phone call today called into question the safety and happiness of one of my children. In seconds a chain reaction began and there was a danger that I would become the velociraptor.
This is just another chapter in an ongoing situation where people are doing their best with the resources they have but unfortunately the problem is not going away.
It would be easy to blame the adults involved or even to blame the other child but the truth is much more complex than the black, white and red that anger allows us to see.
Of course, my first priority is the safety of my child, as it should be. That’s deep programming, that’s nature doing it’s job and me doing mine. But, does this mean that I have to lose my temper? Does this mean that I need to blame someone who is so clearly suffering? Will it help anyone if I shout at people who are doing their best in difficult circumstances?
I need to support my child and keep him safe. The best way I can do that is with good common sense and my feet firmly on the ground. This I will try to do. That is my job right now.
The other issue, the source of my original anger, seems so petty and trivial now. Thank you Universe for reminding me, for giving me perspective. Thank you for not making the reminder more painful as it could so easily have been devastating.
Belly breathing is one practice I use to ground myself when life and situations seem to be taking flight. If you are experiencing strong emotions like anger, I hope you will find it as useful as I do.
- Lie down flat or with a pillow under your knees.
- Slow down your breath and begin to relax your body.
- Bring your hands onto your belly and feel it rise and fall as you breathe.
- With each breath soften your body and let go of any tension or holding.
- Let the earth support you as you relax.
- Visualize roots growing out of your back body, reaching down into the earth.
- Continue peacefully here, enjoying the sensation of your belly rising and falling until you feel calm, supported and grounded.
Thank you for reading. Wishing you presence, peace and joy in every moment.
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Step into Your Light – Friday, November 4 from 7:30– 9:00 PM
‘Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.’ – Marianne Williamson.
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Jacquelyn is a 500 hour Registered Yoga Teacher and Reiki Level Two practitioner. Yoga has helped her to overcome paralyzing fears and chronic pain and find her true purpose in life. Her focus is on encouraging those around her to have patience, kindness and compassion for themselves and the courage to stand, fearless, in their own light. Jacquelyn has studied meditation and mindfulness in the Shambhala tradition and with Thich Nhat Hanh. She teaches Gentle Yoga, Chakra Flow Yoga, EMpower Yoga, Beginners Yoga, Power Yoga, Learn to Meditate and a variety of workshops.