Taming the Green Eyed Monster
For many people, the emotion of jealousy is as common as breathing. They envy what others have, how they look, what they do, where they live; all the while never being truly thankful for their own lives. Jealousy is definitely a monster, unfortunately the person it usually hurts the most is the one living with it.
When we covet what our neighbors’ posses, we become out of alignment with the manifesting powers of the universe. This imbalance can wreak havoc in many forms, starting with anger issues and ending with physical ailments. Jealousy is all about insecurity and our ego; always searching for more, never being satisfied and the unwitting need to compete. Our ego needs us to be the best and to have the most, when we don’t it produces a feeling of ill content that makes us seek to tear those who have what we want to shreds.
When we lose our connection to the Divine, we begin to see ourselves as separate beings and to see the world as having limitations. Those who struggle with jealousy are unaware of the universal abundance and their own manifesting power; they must take what they want instead of creating it. So, when they see somebody as having something that is desirable to them, the feel the need to destroy it on some level and that’s where the actions of envy come in to play.
It comes in a variety of styles and manners like snarky comments, gossip, arguments, rude remarks, resentment and even fits of rage. When the green eyed monster enters the room, his goal is to suck the enjoyment out and bring the person who has what he wants into his misery. Those who are insecure are truly at turmoil and they will unknowingly attempt to pull others into it with them; they cannot be sincerely happy for someone else because they are not satisfied with their own existence. The reasons for insecurity will vary but the outcome is always the same; when the monster strikes somebody always gets hurt.
Coming from a place of understanding will help if you are “attacked” with jealous behavior. We’ve all been in a position where we share good news with a friend or relative and their response is negative, mean, rude or indifferent. Make no mistake; that is jealousy. When somebody cannot unconditionally celebrate your achievement, they are battling insecurity and behaving poorly because of it. The key is not to engage with their lackluster response; we do not need others to make us feel good about our success. Showing disappointment or arguing will only feed the green eyed monster; it’s best to ignore it, realizing that this person’s pain far outweighs your need for them to be happy for you or to defend yourself.
This is an especially important lesson for children as jealousy can run rampant quickly among youth. I’ve seen children act incredibly mean to one another because one had a toy they wanted or got a cookie when they didn’t or was better at soccer etc… Making children aware that they should be happy for others is important for their self worth and their self image. We do not have to be better to be successful; real success comes from fulfillment not achievement.
It is much better to admire people for their achievements; this puts you in alignment with their success because it means it is possible for you to accomplish as well. Admiration is about respect and unlimited potential, jealousy is about contempt and limited probabilities. When you turn from envy to appreciation, you kick all of the negativity to the curb and change your energy to one of manifestation instead of ingratitude.
Taming the Green Eyed Monster merely requires an awareness of behavior. When you recognize it, pay no attention and turn the other cheek. When you feel its presence in your own responses, remember admiration and be happy for what others have because it means it is possible for you too.
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