Parenting without Programming
The key to raising independent thinking children
As a mother of 3 children, ages 12 through 6, I have frequently questioned my parenting decisions and choices. As I progress on my spiritual journey, I naturally want to impart that wisdom onto my children. However, I have come to realize that for any beliefs to truly be our own, we must experience them for ourselves. Which, for me, has lately begged the question; am I parenting or am I programming?
It’s as common as naming your baby after a beloved relative; we teach our kids what we know and, more importantly, what we believe. They are little sponges, soaking up our knowledge, our words, our actions and our energy. They are also miniature mirrors, reflecting back the good, the bad and the ugly of all they contact. So, what are your kids showing you?
Sure, parents and other adults who influence our children believe they are teaching them right from wrong; unfortunately, many do not realize the impact they have on young minds with the words they use. What we say matters and too often people rely upon traditional sayings, handed down generation after generation, as parenting tools. When we employ phrases like “life is not fair”, “money is the root of all evil”, “you have to struggle to get ahead” or “I worry because I care”, what affect does it have on the subconscious mind of our children (and ourselves for that matter)?
Many of us already know the harmful and long lasting impact of negative statements like these. I took me years to unravel this damaging societal programming that was imparted to me by my family, teachers, coaches, friends, etc… I knew I had to ensure that the unconscious belief system of my children remained optimistic, safe and secure. So I chose to consciously parent them and provide a positive, spiritual basis from which they could blossom. Unfortunately, it soon became very clear to me that it was not going to be enough.
My 6th grade daughter arrived home from school one afternoon a little shaken up. When I asked her what was bothering her, she told me it was something one of her teachers said that day in class. The class was talkative and he’d warned them a few times to stop. He insisted that the next person to speak would get a step (a formal written warning). A few minutes later, my daughter asked her teacher what page the class was on and she was given the step. Of course, she was very upset, she had never been in this kind of trouble and the teacher was making an example of her. That was not what lingered with her when she arrived home however; she understood that her teacher gave her the step to show the class he meant business about being quiet and paying attention. It was his reaction to what occurred; instead of standing by his decision, he became angrier and declared to the class that “life is not fair!”. He went on to say that things happen to us and it’s just not fair, my daughter got in trouble because of the rest of the class and that was not fair. Apparently, he used these words so often it was basically his motto.
It truly dawned on me that day, how much other people, especially authority figures like teachers, relatives, coaches, etc., influence our children’s thinking. They will come into their lives and unknowingly drop these false belief bombs that can create the foundation for their subconscious belief system. Although they may have well meaning intentions, the results can be very harmful and long lasting. Because our children are in school a good portion of their day, they hear these repeated messages and the results can be a type of unintended subconscious programming.
That is why teaching our kids spiritual concepts like the law of attraction is so important. My kids already knew that our words and thoughts manifest our lives, which is why my daughter was so disturbed when her teacher exclaimed to his class that “life is not fair”; she knew what that type of thinking could create. I started to wonder about the other kids in her class, who was teaching them about universal laws so they could decipher the truth from egoic words? And what about my own children; how could I truly instill my beliefs and yet allow them to ultimately think for themselves?
The goal was not to program my children to fall in line with my beliefs, that was no better then what has been happening to our youth for generations. It’s far better and much more powerful to give them a foundation but ultimately have them learn for themselves and decide what to believe. Avoiding negativity was a great start, however, that could potentially be undone in one school afternoon because of the way others communicate. The key is parenting without programming and there is a method for to avoid the madness.
Encouraging our children to read, review and research relentlessly is how we allow them to learn independently and also prevent traditional agenda style teaching. When we empower children with their own learning, they not only learn the lessons, they experience the knowledge by ingesting it of their own accord. A great time to start is when they are able to read novel style books. It is through books that we can imagine, imitate and initiate that which we read. This is why the self-help genre is so popular; God truly does help those who help themselves.
I searched for a book for my children because I knew that was the answer; I also knew that when I found one I would bestow it upon all of the children in my life. The ideal text would discuss the negativity of our long-held life lessons, expose their false nature and shine the light of truth. It also needed to provide details about the universal laws that govern us all because, in public school, children only learn about man-made laws. Through this book, I could provide the foundation for my children to learn about concepts aligned with my beliefs and avoid the pitfalls of purposefully programming them to follow a set of standards.
Unfortunately, I only found picture books or simple children’s books and, although they were adorable and taught great ideas for younger children, they did not fit the bill for my 9 year old son and 12 year old daughter. It soon became crystal clear to me; I had been writing as a hobby for years and had always dreamt about writing a book but a topic had never really stuck with me; until now. And so, I began writing my book, “Truth Works, Divine Life Lessons for Kids of all Ages”.
The goal was to achieve what I set out to find but I also wanted to include the grownups. By teaching children and adults these concepts we can finally put an end to our world’s cycle of egoic chaos. If you are interested in parenting without programming and looking for a way to start independent thinking and spiritual self realization for your children, please visit www.ginasendef.com for more information and a sample chapter. I have decided to self-publish this book to retain control of the material and you can place your pre-order on the website, publication will occur when 100 pre-orders are received.
When you understand the subconscious negativity of our long held life lessons does work, you’ll understand why Truth Works.